Remember the B-52s at the Alamo?Profnet is...

Remember the B-52s at the Alamo?

Profnet is an electronic clearinghouse for journalists whose queries are referred to experts. Jeff Bliss of Pepperdine University was idly perusing a list of requests received by Profnet when he noticed this one from a military magazine editor:

“I’m looking for some information on contributions made by the Mexican Air Force to the U.S. during the Revolutionary War, Civil War and World War II for a story I’m working on.”

Forget about the Mexican Air Force! We’d be fascinated to read about the U.S. Air Force in the Revolutionary or Civil War.

BUT ANGELS STILL FEAR TO TREAD HERE: Laura Zaragoza of Mount St. Mary’s College in Brentwood sent along a photo of a new traffic sign on the entrance road to the school (see photo).

TODAY’S BLUE PLATE SPECIAL: David Hamlin writes that this column’s “recent adventures in plate-speak” prompt him to offer one of his favorites, spotted on a car Pico Boulevard--LO IM VE.

Can you decipher it?

OPEN WIDE: Danny Gould of Studio City found an announcement in an entertainment journal for what sounded like a get-together for the tooth-pulling profession (see accompanying). We’re sure it won’t hurt a bit.

PARKING IS SUCH STREET SORROW: That’s an old line from columnist Herb Caen, the Bard of Baghdad by the Bay. It certainly applies to Southern California, where public parking is now $9 at Will Rogers State Beach. We had to consult “Will Rogers Speaks” (edited by Bryan and Frances Sterling) to see if the cowboy-philosopher was surprised. He wasn’t.

“Politics ain’t worrying this country one-tenth as much as finding a parking space,” commented the always-topical Rogers (in 1924).

TIMELESS WILL: Some other enduring observations by Rogers, an early resident of Pacific Palisades:

* On the entertainment capital: “Hollywood is like a desert waterhole in Africa. Hang around long enough and every kind of animal in the world will drift in for refreshments.” (1931)

* On gasoline: “Driving from bank to bank a man has to be careful nowadays, for at the price of gas he will burn up more gasoline trying to get a loan than the loan is worth.” (1931)

* On college sports: “College athletes are always coming up to me and asking, ‘When should I turn pro?’ And I tell ‘em: ‘Not until you have earned all you can in college.’ ” (1929)

* On Bill Clinton’s home state: “Any time you tangle with an Arkansaw hillbilly or hillbillyess, you are going to run second.” (1935)

* On Bob Dole’s home state: “The principal industry of Kansas was bootlegging.” (1919)

* On the criminal justice system: “In a Los Angeles bank robbery last week, two were killed and four captured. Well, I wish you could read the crime and jail records of those six men. They had been paroled from every institution in the state at least once a month for the last 15 years. . . .” (1932)

PLATE-SPEAK ANSWER: “No ambiguity here,” Hamlin says. “The driver has found true romance.” He translates LO IM VE as “I’m in love.”

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The L.A. Daily Journal reports that Robert Gant, a lawyer-turned-actor, has switched his focus from the state Bar to the ice cream bar. He’s the model in the new advertising campaign for Good Humor ice cream. Here comes da fudge!