Her Golden Experience Is Worth More Than $3.5 Million

OK, you’re a grown-up, but pretend for a moment you’re a teenager.

And, OK, you have two left feet but pretend instead you’re a talented athlete. In fact, pretend you’re a world-class athlete.

Got it? You’re a teenage world-class athlete.

Question: Which would you rather be--an Olympic gold-medal swimmer like Amanda Beard of Irvine or Kobe Bryant, just signed by the Los Angeles Lakers?

Sounds like an easy question, doesn’t it? So far, Beard, 14, has pocketed exactly zero dollars. Bryant, 17, has signed a contract for $3.5 million.

I’d rather be Beard.

Can you imagine what it’s going to feel like to walk into English class at Irvine High School in a few weeks as an Olympic gold-medal winner?

Cool.

“Hey, Amanda, do anything fun on your summer vacation?”

I won a spelling bee in the sixth grade, and I still remember my classmates carrying me on their shoulders into the school gym. It was probably the highlight of my life up until then.

If I’m Amanda, who turns 15 in October, I walk with my head in the clouds for my entire high school career. I don’t pout if I get a C or if I don’t get invited to the prom. I just keep telling myself I’m one of the luckiest teenagers in the world and try to keep my head screwed on straight.

It wouldn’t be easy. To remember having been up on the Olympic platform with a gold medal around my neck . . . To be able to watch the videotape of it for the rest of my life . . .

You don’t put a price tag on that. I wouldn’t take any amount of money instead of it.

On the other hand, I wouldn’t want to be Kobe Bryant. Oh, maybe if I were 17, I might think I’d want to be him, but being as old as I am now, I know I wouldn’t want to.

It’s not Bryant’s fault he isn’t in the Olympics. In the old days, before the Dream Team grabbed the spots, this dream teen probably would have made the Olympic squad, even with collegians vying for spots. He would have had his shot at the kind of joy Amanda Beard must be feeling.

Instead, Kobe, who won’t be 18 until next month, is getting his kicks another way. He decided to turn pro right out of high school and, like anyone would after making that decision, signed for the big bucks. The Lakers were eager to make him rich. Let’s hope they don’t ruin his youth in the process.

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Actually, it’s not the Lakers per se who could potentially rob Bryant of his youth. It’s the NBA.

Turning 18 will make Bryant a legal adult, but he’s still a kid. Picture how he’ll spend most of the rest of his teenage years. During the season, which will last from October into June, he’ll spend half his life on the road, living out of a suitcase and hotel rooms. Do you think he’ll make lots of friends on his one-day stops through Denver, San Antonio, Salt Lake City, Indianapolis, New York?

I kind of doubt it.

Do you think the other guys on the team--men in their 20s and 30s--are going to pal around with the 18-year-old?

I kind of doubt it.

I hope Kobe is good at whiling away idle time, because he’s going to have tons of it. I shudder to think of what I would have done at age 18 with $3.5 million and lots of free time, on top of the pressure of playing in the NBA.

Some argue that, what’s the difference--lots of 18-year-olds don’t go to college. They go to work or, if they’re athletes like Bryant, they sign baseball contracts. Going to work in the same town and going home to the same house every night is a lot more stabilizing than the life Bryant has bought into. And playing in the minor leagues--which is where virtually all 18-year-old ballplayers go--at least puts the kid in with other people his own age.

I don’t know anything about Bryant. Maybe he’ll hit the league running and adjust marvelously to the lifestyle. Maybe he likes daytime TV from a hotel bed. His dad played in the NBA, and his experience likely will be helpful in preparing his son.

I hope so.

To a 17-year-old, signing with the Lakers and making $3.5 million probably sounds unreal. That’s exactly what worries me. To a 17-year-old, the NBA life is unreal.

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My guess is that while Kobe will be sitting around sometime next spring wondering what he’s supposed to do with himself at 2 in the afternoon in some Detroit hotel room, young Amanda Beard will still be having the time of her life, pondering how much fun it is to still be a kid.

Surrounded by friends, she’ll have plenty of people to talk to.

Surrounded by no one, if Kobe wants to talk to a friend, he’ll have to make a long-distance phone call.

Dana Parsons’ column appears Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Readers may reach Parsons by writing to him at the Times Orange County Edition, 1375 Sunflower Ave., Costa Mesa, CA 92626, or calling (714) 966-7821.