Child Psychotherapist Raises a Stink

The Jan. 14 article “A New Study--and Debate--on Toilet Training” included the advice that parents should not act repelled by the soiled diaper. There’s a problem here: Feces, even those of your cherished toddler, are inherently repellent. That’s why we have toilets and train our tots to use them.

My experience as a child psychotherapist for 25 years has included children whose parents have been unable to help them accomplish toilet training. Most of these parents have sought to protect the child from experiencing any moments of discomfort during this process.

Certainly there is no need to make a big deal about it, but the fact is that feces stink and parents who lead their toddler to believe that he’s so special that his don’t stink are giving the child an inaccurate picture of reality.

Brief moments of shame accompany the realization that one’s own feces are not special. These moments are part of learning about the world and are not damaging to children reared in loving family circumstances.

FRANCES BROWN

Van Nuys