Laugh Lines

* The creators of Barney are suing the San Diego Chicken for pretending to beat up a fake Barney at games. “I sue you. You sue me. Let’s go see the grand jury.” (Jerry Perisho)

* “Cowboys owner Jerry Jones gave coach Barry Switzer his full backing Thursday,” says Argus Hamilton. “He said his job is secure, they’ll ride through the rough times together and nothing will change that. In other words, it’s still week to week.”

* The Bush presidential library opened last week. “Presidential libraries are a relatively new phenomenon,” explains the Cutler Daily Scoop. “They call them libraries because it doesn’t have the same ring to say, ‘monuments we build to ourselves.’ ”