* “New research says that when it...

* “New research says that when it comes to low-fat, low-cholesterol diets, extremes are not good,” reports Jerry Perisho. “So says the American Pork Rinds Council.”

* The journal Nature published a study that says supermarket shoppers bought French wine when the cancan was played in the store and German wine when they heard oompah music. “And they bought California wine when the store played five newscasters carrying on about El Nin~o.” (Argus Hamilton)

* Colin Powell, who announced he won’t run for president in 2000, once said, “Politics requires a calling that I do not yet hear.” “Here’s my question,” says Jay Leno. “If a man like Colin Powell can’t hear it, how do Sonny Bono and Dan Quayle hear it?”

* SEND US A LINE: Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Life & Style, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053.