KCBS: the Good, the Bad and the Unsavory

In an episode of the former HBO comedy “Dream On,” book editor Martin Tupper’s snide secretary, Toby, informs him of her plans to compile a tome about things that irritate her. Running down her list, Martin is stopped cold by “Uruguay.”

“You’ve never even been there,” he protests.

“I know,” she replies. “Somethin’ about it just pisses me off.”

And so it is with the intrepid food commandos at KCBS-TV Channel 2. Something about them. . . .

They’re at it again, with Channel 2 timing these noisily promoted reports to coincide with the heavily watched Winter Olympics on CBS. Nor is it a coincidence that February just happens to be a ratings sweeps month. If Channel 2 were really concerned about public health, why not release this information pronto, instead of only when it’s most financially beneficial to the station?

Yet the timing shouldn’t matter, should it? After all, as when it launched this “Behind the Kitchen Door” undercover expose last November, Channel 2 is essentially on the side of the angels here. How can its investigative “I Team” be faulted by any straight-thinking person for exposing filthy conditions and other health code violations in restaurants in metropolitan Los Angeles and adjoining regions? If regulations are not being enforced, if these establishments are, indeed, endangering patrons by keeping kitchens that are hazardous to public health, the public should know about it.

Although envious competing stations may snicker, Channel 2 appears on solid public-service turf here.

On Sunday night (with repeats Monday), for example, Channel 2 aired videotape of reporter Joel Grover, “food safety expert” Pete Snyder and a camera crew returning “with no advance warning” to local restaurants that had been ordered to either clean up or close down after the station’s original reports.

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Some of the new footage was nearly as dramatic, with the Channel 2 raiders again finding “major violations” at Ocean Star in Monterey Park and a “grimy mess” at Manila Cuisine in Reseda. The evidence, as presented by Channel 2, spoke for itself.

On its 11 p.m. Monday newscast (with repeats Tuesday), moreover, Grover went to the station’s database to produce a list of restaurants--from Los Angeles, Orange, Riverside and San Bernardino counties--that he said had received low marks from health inspectors, information that you’d think would be vital to patrons of those establishments.

So, then, what is it about Channel 2? Why is so much of what it does, the valid along with the invalid, so . . . irritating?

In the case of the restaurant exposes, part of it is the smug self-righteousness of Grover, who, in the latest farcically staged station promo for its “I Team,” is shown marching at the head of this eclectic group like the leader of a local temperance society en route to closing down the city’s saloons. What pleasure it would be to see this pompous face encounter a cream pie.

In addition, Channel 2 can be counted on to inevitably live up to the tabloid reputation it’s hoping to shed. Abandoning restraint and soaring over the top has become its routine. That’s true even when the cause is worthwhile, as in Sunday night’s restaurant report that included previously cited establishments that now appear to have reformed.

One was Canter’s, where Grover and his gang showed up unannounced (“Hi, we’re with Channel 2”), only to be met in the kitchen by a female employee and told to leave. The conflict included someone putting a hand over the camera lens. “After a few heated moments,” Grover reported, “the owner . . . agreed to show us around.” The upshot was that Canter’s kitchen earned Channel 2’s seal of approval.

Thus, what was the purpose of including the clash with the employee, with Grover’s voice-over saying, “Not everyone was so happy to see us,” except to show a resistance to the TV camera that somehow implied secrecy and, therefore, guilt? As if Channel 2 had a divine right to invade private property at will.

Later in that same report, Channel 2 showed its latest footage from Pantry Cafe, the restaurant owned by Los Angeles Mayor Richard Riordan that was closed down by county health inspectors for a day last November. After bursting into the kitchen, Grover and his gang were shown being confronted by a confused-looking male worker who ordered them to leave.

Grover: “This is the mayor’s restaurant. Why can’t we look around?” Grover added in a voice-over: “When we tried to look from the street, a guard blocked our lens and workers closed the blinds, denying us even a quick look behind the mayor’s kitchen door.” He later added, “The mayor’s press secretary tells us she had no idea why we were not allowed inside the Pantry Cafe.”

Two possible reasons come to mind. One is that the Channel 2 crew didn’t appear clean enough. Had Grover washed his hands? Maybe he and his colleagues would have soiled the facilities. What’s sauce for the goose. . . .

Also, put yourself in the place of a restaurant employee seeing a bunch of people with a TV camera march into the kitchen unannounced and uninvited. Even if your place was squeaky-clean, wouldn’t you kick them out?

Of course, doing so implies guilt, something that Channel 2 appeared to be hoping for. Which is why even when the station is pursuing something positive, like cleaning up restaurant kitchens, you’re left with a bad taste.