Two Words to the Wise: ‘Yes, Dear’

For years, men desiring successful marriages were told to employ “active listening,” which required the guy to say, “What I hear you saying is. . . . “ But it turns out that the real key to success is something a lot easier and more straightforward.

The conclusion of a major study published Saturday goes something like this: Your wife never lets you leave home dressed like “Dweeb Goes to the Office,” does she? So regard her thoughts, criticisms and suggestions as seriously as you would have her treat yours.

Unfortunately, male reporters, editors and headline writers apparently were the ones who spread the news. “Wife May Wear the Pants in Successful Marriage,” blared a Florida newspaper. “Accept that she’s the boss,” said one columnist. “Do just what your wife tells you” was another interpretation. “Husbands: Just Shut Up and Listen,” said another. Mind you, these are the folks who get paid to listen carefully.

Now, how many men, thus deceived, will return home ready to draw a line in the carpet? Goodbye, sensitive male. Hello, Fred Flintstone.

No need. If the researchers are right, a man’s “Yes, dear” will become the code not of the henpecked husband but of the wise one.