All for the Love of Learning

I just graduated from high school at age 39.

I got married in Mexico when I was 15; my husband was just 16. By the ages of 20 and 21 respectively, we already had three children. Our children were a big responsibility and I knew I had to learn a skill to help with the many expenses we had.

I learned that skill from my mother, who is a seamstress and clothing designer. Eventually I ran my own little business. Being self-employed and economically independent gave me some stability and confidence.

Even so, I always had an emptiness in my life. Somehow I always felt worth less than educated people. I always spent a lot of my spare time reading. Somehow I knew that my lack of confidence was related to my lack of knowledge.

When I arrived in this country three years ago, I enrolled in adult school to learn English. Soon I found that the middle school, high school and an excellent and complete computer program were at my disposal, if I just finished the English as a Second Language program.

I got excited with the idea of being a regular student and learning all those things that I missed when I was young. With my three children grown and doing well, it was as if life was giving me a second chance. And I took it.

I had only attended elementary school in my country, and that was 27 years ago.

I made a decision. I knew it was the missing part in my life. I set a goal and made a commitment to do it. But it wasn’t easy. When I told my husband my plans and my schedule, he couldn’t believe that I was serious. He told me that he always thought that I was happy with my work, and I was!

This was different. I was looking for more than a new skill to make more money. The feeling of just being there, sitting in a classroom every day, learning new things was great from the beginning. School came to fill the emptiness in my life.

I enrolled in morning, afternoon and night classes. Trying to be a good wife, a good mother and a good student, there were times when I only had the chance to sleep for four or five hours a night, but I never gave up. To attend my classes every day was a pleasure for me, and the feeling of achievement was my recompense.

Now, I don’t want to remember with sorrow the many obstacles and difficulties that I have gone through. I’d rather think of my diploma as a steppingstone toward bigger and better projects.

Graduating from high school has given me the confidence that I need to succeed not only as a student but in life.

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Lizza Guzman lives in Los Angeles.