He Might Not Know Art, but He Hates This Game

After the Miami Heat players he is teaching to be gangsters lost their cool and the game Thursday night to the New York Knick players he taught to be gangsters, Pat Riley needed a moment alone to collect himself in the corridor outside the dressing room.

As the television camera captured him, leaning face-first against the wall with his eyes closed, I hoped he was reflecting on the damage his coaching style has inflicted on basketball, the NBA in particular. From his comments afterward, it soon became apparent that was not the case.

We should have guessed Riley would change when he became a convert of Sun Tzu, the ancient Chinese philosopher-warlord who wrote “The Art of War.”

The Pat Riley who coached the Lakers to four championships believed in the art of basketball, the kind of basketball Mikhail Baryshnikov talked about when he called the sport “ballet without choreography.”

Riley talked in those days about “going to war” and “making statements” and “sending messages,” but it was in the context of adding substance to a team that preferred flash so that the Lakers could stand up to the East Coast Huns and make the world safe for Showtime.

Who could have guessed when Riley coached the Lakers against Detroit’s Bad Boys that he would ever go over to the dark side, creating teams of Worse Boys?

What has he wrought besides a style of basketball that is almost unwatchable?

His own team’s downfall.

Because they were more interested in going to war than winning games, his players lost a playoff series to a Knick team that didn’t even have Patrick Ewing.

Does Riley get it?

Apparently not.

After the fight that cost the Heat center Alonzo Mourning for Sunday’s decisive game, Riley said, “The only . . . thing I’m disappointed in is that that Zo didn’t connect when he tried to punch that [expletive for Larry Johnson] in the face.”

Pat, I don’t even know who you are anymore.

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One of the weirdest-funniest theories I’ve heard this year was advanced by Councilman Mark Ridley-Thomas and developer Ed Roski. . . .

“Houston sportswriters criticize Los Angeles--are they only repeating some of L.A.’s news stories?” the New Coliseum partners said in a news release. . . .

Believe me, Houston sportswriters don’t need help when it comes to criticizing Los Angeles. . . .

If they did, though, I suppose they should know that, on the weekend four high-ranking NFL officials were here to address the issue of football in Los Angeles, Ridley-Thomas and Roski weren’t getting along. . . .

A reason the NFL might favor the Carson site, besides the fact that its sponsor is Michael Ovitz, is to avoid L.A. politics. . . .

The NFL officials are scheduled to see Michael Eisner today. . . .

Unable to think of reasons on my own to criticize Houston, considered Los Angeles’ primary rival for an expansion team, I am compelled to repeat a news story from there. . . .

According to the Houston Chronicle, the city’s bid is suddenly staggering. . . .

One of two leading financial backers backed out because he’s frustrated over stadium negotiations with the city that he believes are threatening Houston’s chances. . . .

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A recent ESPN Chilton poll revealed that 69.1% of sports fans are not at all interested in horse racing and that only 19.1% are more than a bit interested. . . .

No one can blame trainer Bob Baffert, who does all he can to attract attention to the sport. . . .

On the afternoon of the Kentucky Derby, with two highly regarded horses running, he took the time to call the “Trackside with Roger Stein” radio show on XTRA 690. . . .

It figured that Kent Desormeaux, riding in his seventh Derby, would finally win one in the year John Elway won the Super Bowl, Dale Earnhardt won the Daytona 500 and Mark O’Meara, in his 15th try, won the Masters. . . .

What’s next? The Cubs or Red Sox winning the World Series? . . .

As the Mighty Ducks’ Tony Tavares and Jack Ferreira no doubt have noticed, Ron Wilson’s Washington Capitals are the Eastern Conference’s highest seeded team remaining. . . .

Washington Post columnist Tony Kornheiser used to refer to the Capitals as “the choking dogs.” . . .

Now he calls them “the barking dogs.” . . .

When the Ducks fired Wilson a year ago, Ferreira said the reasons soon would become clear. . . .

I’m still waiting.

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While wondering if the Lakers can get Jerome Kersey back before Wednesday night, I was thinking: Jeremy Mayfield is NASCAR’s next star, I’m glad that lawsuit between Kareem and Karim has been settled because I kept getting those two confused, Karim is now changing his name to Magic.