Stores in Britain Have Fat Chance of Finding Enough Suitable Santas
British stores are desperately seeking fat, elderly men to play Santa in their Christmas grottoes.
Salads and workouts at the gym have taken their toll on the cast of seasonal actors who usually don white beards and red robes to bring Father Christmas alive for millions of children.
“We just cannot find any suitable actors who are still, shall we say, on the porky side. All the applicants seem to live on salads and look after their bodies,” said a spokesman for the Ministry of Fun entertainment agency Saturday.
“They’re too thin. You cannot just strap a cushion on them and hope to fool the kids because they’ll suss it out [figure it out] straightaway,” he added.
The agency has sent out a plea for fat actors to come forward after demand for Santas from stores and shopping malls outstripped supply.
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