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Hitting a Velvet Gold Mine

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Whether the subject matter is Elvis Presley or JFK, the black velvet confers a cheesy immortality. How appropriate, then, that Bill Robison has embraced the furry medium for O.J. Simpson, Jack Kevorkian, Monica Lewinsky and other standouts for his “American Tabloid Heroes Collection.”

“These people were dragged from whatever world they had and stuffed into the realm of American tabloid mythology,” Robison, a former film student, says with melodramatic concern. “For that, they need to be honored--and they need to be honored on velvet.”

Robison auctions the velvets, hand-painted by Tijuana artists, through the Internet’s eBay. When the bids are in, a tabloid superheroine like Monica, captured in her infamous blue dress and a dazzling pearl necklace, and validated by a “certificate of authenticity,” can usually be had for $75.

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Since he began selling velvets online a year ago, business has grown robustly. Commissioning new inventory from painters Jorge Terrones and Arturo Gonzales--”the velvet Da Vincis”--he’s learned to navigate the delicate political pathways of the Tijuana art world. And it all began as a hoax.

When the Republican Party pronounced San Diego as the spot for its 1996 convention, Robison was outraged that, “at the height of the party’s Prop. 187 anti-immigrant fervor, they arrogantly chose a town right on the Mexican border. It seemed like a really cruel joke--so I decided to joke back.”

In Tijuana, he commissioned black velvet paintings of Republican leaders. He then hired two Salvadoran American actors to masquerade as salesmen, settled on the company name of Patriot Portrait Collectibles and procured a booth in the convention’s vendors section. Robison lurked at a distance with his camcorder to capture the antics: the actors hiding behind dark shades, chomping cheap cigars and giving lectures on how to keep Velvet Newt Gingrich clean with a special lint brush. Amid all the high jinks, they even managed to move 10 paintings, the hottest seller being Velvet Reagan, for $500 a pop. Reporters from the San Diego Tribune, CNN and U.S. News & World Report fell for it, and not until now has he admitted masterminding this absurdist theater.

Three years later, Robison, 31, who also works in film distribution, plans to use his black velvet profits to produce a film based on his convention experience. As much as he’s seen people swoon in reveries of kitsch and camp over Jesse “the Velvet” Ventura, Robison says: “What I really aim to do with these velvets is to mock our culture into changing its tawdry little tune. I plan to keep going until this happens, or I move too far away from Tijuana. Whichever comes first.”

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https://www.velvetrepublican@mindspring.com

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