Hard Shell Needed in Restaurant Biz

While on jury duty, Josh Mankiewicz of TV’s “Dateline NBC” overheard two lawyers discussing where to have lunch. One of them said, “I hear that new place in Beverly Hills called the Crust Station is really good.”

Hope this doesn’t put the owners of Crustacean restaurant in a crabby mood.

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THE NEW COMEBACK KID? Former Congressman Robert Dornan probably didn’t win any friends south of the border with his two bruising (and losing) campaigns against Rep. Loretta Sanchez (D-Garden Grove). Now it appears the folks at the Agua Caliente racetrack are having some fun at his expense. In the Tijuana track’s latest Election 2000 betting line, the odds on Dornan capturing the presidency are listed at 999 to 1. When the odds were first listed in 1997, he was 1,000 to 1.

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AS IF THE TRAFFIC WASN’T ANNOYING ENOUGH . . . : The Times’ Rick Meyer found a sign in the Hollywood Hills showing a face that seemed to be mocking motorists (see photo).

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RETURN OF EL NINO? Milt Long snapped a shot that brought back memories of last year--or of Thursday--but it was just a placard in a City Council campaign in Palos Verdes Estates. Enough votes streamed in, by the way, to elect John Flood.

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TAKE MY PILOT, PLEASE . . . : David Oyadomari of Manhattan Beach sent along a collection of wisecracks by airline attendants, which has been making the rounds at Boeing in Long Beach. May I have your attention, please:

* “There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only four ways to leave this airplane.”

* “We do feature a smoking section on this flight. If you must smoke, contact a member of the flight crew and we will escort you to the wings.”

* “To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt, and if you don’t know how to operate one, you probably shouldn’t be out in public unsupervised.”

* “As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses.”

And, finally, after a very bumpy landing in Salt Lake City:

* “That was quite a bump and I know what y’all are thinking. I’m here to tell you it wasn’t the airline’s fault. It wasn’t the pilot’s fault. It wasn’t the flight attendant’s fault. It was the asphalt.”

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NO CANNONBALL DIVES, EITHER: On an ocean cruise, Frank Clement of Whittier noticed an odd warning for a pool that is less than 2 feet deep (see photo).

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A BIG GAMBLE? Leota Daniel of Montecito spotted a blurb for a $200,000 property that ended by saying that it could be your “dread” home. Asks Daniel: “Because of the taxes and upkeep?”

miscelLAny:

She couldn’t help but laugh, says Helen Infange of Newbury Park, when a computerized letter from a mail order music company arrived for her deceased husband, George. It told the late Mr. Infange: “George, won’t you come back home to country music?” and “Truth is we miss you, George.”

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Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.