Barkley’s Masterpiece Can’t Win the Prize

What does it avail a man if he winneth his matchup but loseth the game?

This was one they could have hung on a museum wall, a tour de force by that famous artist, Sir Charles Barkley, who toyed with the Lakers’ power forwards and fans for all but the last :07 Sunday, when the ball squirted away from Scottie Pippen and bad things started to happen to the Rockets.

Kobe Bryant made two free throws.

Shaquille O’Neal blocked Cuttino Mobley’s shot.

Barkley fired a chair against a wall on the way to the dressing room.

You win some, you lose some, but some are a lot bigger than others, especially when you’re 36, on the road and running out of hurrahs.

“Well, obviously we let one get away today,” Barkley said later. “That’s just a no-brainer. I mean, you got the lead and the ball and you turn it over--that’s frustrating. . . . That’s not like a cop-out. We turned the ball over too many times with the game on the line. That’s not to blame anybody. We all win together and we lose together.”

Sunday they lost together, turning the ball over twice in the last 1:31, the first by rookie point guard Mobley, the second by Pippen, who tried to beat Bryant off the dribble and lost the ball with :07 left, giving the Lakers the ball back once too often.

Up to then, Barkley joked with fans at courtside, exhorted the crowd to stand up for big plays, held his hand behind his ear when they booed him, pulled the hair on Derek Fisher’s arm as they lined up for a free throw late in the game, and even saluted Mother’s Day after scoring on J.R. Reid in the post, screaming, “His mother can’t stop me!”

Or something like that.

Charlie played with Reid like a kitten with a ball of yarn, moved Robert Horry around like a tinker toy and got Kurt Rambis so desperate, he switched the ultimate weapon, O’Neal, onto Barkley, who comes up to about Shaq’s collarbone. . . which left Reid on Hakeem Olajuwon, whom the Rockets promptly posted up for a three-point play and a 100-98 lead with 1:03 left.

With :28 left, Olajuwon missed a jumper, O’Neal rebounded and Barkley promptly fouled him, daring him to hit two free throws to tie the game.

Shaq missed one and the Rockets had the ball and the lead, even if they weren’t unanimous about the wisdom of that course.

“I feel like if we just go down and play defense [rather than foul O’Neal], then the clock is on our side,” said Pippen. “They have to score and if they miss, they have to foul us. But we gave them the chance to come down and put the pressure on us for 28 seconds. . . . That turned out to not work to our favor, fouling Shaq.”

“I don’t really want to go back and forth about that,” said Barkley. “We had the lead and the ball. . . I always want the lead and the ball in any situation. that always works. . . .

“We did what we wanted to do, every time Shaq got the ball, we wanted to foul him.”

Barkley finished with 25 points and three assists that all went to Sam Mack for crushing three-pointers in the fourth quarter, so let’s just say, it’s a matchup the Lakers are still studying closely.

Before the game, Barkley suggested happily no one can play him one-on-one in the post, even Dennis Rodman, whom the Lakers used to let try to do it.

“That’s why I was sad to see him go,” said Barkley.

Apart from that?

“We played Minnesota about a month ago and I was torturing everybody and they put Kevin Garnett on me and he gave me nightmares,” said Barkley. “All big guys with long arms give me trouble--but there aren’t that many guys who I can say are tall and have got long arms. Kevin McHale is the best guy I ever played against. Elden Campbell gave me some trouble. Garnett, he’s the guy I’d say right now plays me better than anybody.”

Short of dealing for Garnett, coaxing McHale out of retirement or asking Campbell to let bygones be bygones, the Lakers will have to go with who they have, and see if they can help there faster.

Nevertheless, they won and the Rockets lost so what was it all worth?

“Right now, I’m disappointed and depressed,” said Barkley. “Now once I go and get a good night’s sleep, it’s going to be a new day for us tomorrow. Only thing, when you lose a game like this, you got to listen to them idiotic fans in town for 24 hours before the next game.”

Anyone who has followed his career knows that he’ll be out among you Laker fans for the next few days, or nights, but as long as everyone extends him the courtesy due a man of his stature, no one has to go airborne and everyone should make it back Tuesday for Game 2.