LAUGH LINES

Do Ya Think He’s Sexy?: Richard Gere is People magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive for 1999. “And today, Donald Trump demanded a recount.” (Andrew Wisot)

Romance in the ‘90s: Paul McCartney denies he’s dating. “Rock stars don’t need to date. All they have to do is throw a concert and announce which hotel they’re staying in.” (Gary Easley)

TV at Its . . .: “The TV networks are finalizing their plans for New Year’s Eve. Fox will air ‘When Y2K Bugs Attack!’ ” (Daily Scoop)

TV at Its . . . Part II: Fox has signed Jenny McCarthy to do a show. “This just in: McCarthy’s sitcom has just become the first show of 2000 to be canceled.” (Scoop)

“Researchers have discovered that how one is brought up--not genes--determines one’s personality. Confirming once and for all that Al Gore and Bill Bradley were raised by doorposts.” (Joshua Sostrin)

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Chris Pina

Rejected Cable Sports Shows

* “Nude Luge”

* “Extreme Gardening”

* “Real Wrestling”

* “Synchronized Whitewater Rafting”

* “Contact Yahtzee”

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Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles, CA 90053.