Yo, Ricky, What Are You Doing New Year’s Eve?

L.A. vida loca?

Singing sensation Ricky Martin performing atop the Hollywood sign on New Year’s Eve?

That’s the rumor that was floating around town Friday. Hollywood activist Joe Shea heard it at a community meeting with the Police Department--Martin supposedly would be on a stage on the letter W.

Al Nodal, general manager of the Cultural Affairs Department, received an e-mail about a similar report.

But the mayor’s office and Nodal deny that there is anything to it. “We’re going to have a spectacular light show [at the sign], but it’s for TV and we’ve promised the community we’ll be in and out in 30 minutes,” he said.

Not that the light show will be lacking the human element.

Nodal said the tentative plan is for “the mayor to stand beneath the sign and flip a switch” activating the lights.

Hey, if not Ricky Martin, why not Richard Riordan?

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FROM LOCA TO LOONIES: While visiting Vancouver, H.J. Loether of Rancho Palos Verdes found a parking lot that seemed reserved for, uh, offbeat types (see photo). Actually, “loonies” are what Canadians call their $1 coins.

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BUT BACK TO MYSTERY GUESTS: Ken Sain of Altadena came upon a church marquee that left a few unanswered questions (see photo).

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STRIKING OUT: After the firing of Dodger CEO Bob Graziano, sportscaster Joe “The Big Nasty” McDonnell of KFWB-AM (980) asked listeners to click on to his Web site and answer the question: “Which Dodger head will be the next to roll?” Don’t forget the Angel heads.

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NOT FOR LANDLUBBERS: With the heat wave the way it’s been, I guess one Long Beach apartment owner figured he could find tenants who only wanted to rent space outdoors (see photo).

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PUNISHMENT TO THEIR EARS: I’ve mentioned how teachers, as well as judges, have sentenced young miscreants to listen to the likes of Wayne Newton, Frank Sinatra and Roy Rogers.

Val Rodriguez of Signal Hill came across a story in the Times of London about officials at Gloucestershire Airport who have come up with a new way to keep the runway clear of sea gulls, blackbirds and rooks.

“We have a special vehicle with loudspeakers on the roof, and we used to broadcast cassette tapes with birds’ distress sounds on them,” said airport officer Ron Johnson. “But we have found they don’t work very well, and what the birds really hate is Tina Turner.”

And here Tina thought that love had everything to do with it.

miscelLAny:

The Web site for the city of Los Angeles’ Y2K bash (www.lacelebrate2000.org) lists “mayoral and City Council presentations” as an event in the time slot from 8:45 p.m. to 9:15 p.m. Half an hour? Those politicos may speak into the next millennium.

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Steve Harvey can be reached by phone at (213) 237-7083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com and by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053.