When Dumb Things Happen to Roll off the Lips of Famous Folks

All of us say stupid things. Luckily, there usually aren’t tape-recorders or videocams around to capture them. But politicians and celebrities, which these days are increasingly difficult to tell apart, aren’t quite so lucky.

Two books memorialize what happens when celebrities and politicians stray from their scripted remarks. The books, compiled by Ross and Kathryn Petras, are cleverly titled “The Stupidest Things Ever Said by Politicians” (Pocket Books, 1999) and “Stupid Celebrities: Over 500 of the Most Idiotic Things Ever Said by Famous People” (Andrews McMeel Publishing, 1998).

Here are some of the stupidest of the stupid, culled from both books:

* “Women are hard enough to handle now without giving them a gun.”

--Sen. Barry Goldwater,

talking about women in the armed services

* “[I am] pro-choice with limitations, pro-life with exceptions.”

--U.S. Sen. John Warner

* “I will not tolerate intolerance.”

--Viagra spokesman

and former U.S. Sen. Bob Dole

* “One of my role models, Xena the Warrior Princess, comes from here.”

--Secretary of State Madeleine Albright,

during a trip to New Zealand

* “Smoking kills. If you’re killed, you’ve lost a very important part of your life.”

--Actress Brooke Shields

* “It’s really hard to maintain a one-on-one relationship if the other person is not going to allow me to be with other people.”

--Axl Rose, lead singer of Guns N’ Roses