LAUGH LINES

Symbiosis: “Miller Beer announced that it is going to be the first brewery to sell beer in plastic bottles that can be recycled. Combining beer with recycling. Finally some common ground for Bush and Gore--Bush can drink it, Gore can recycle it.” (Jay Leno)

. . . And Your Point?: “Bush says he’s going to attack Al Gore with all of the Clinton scandals. And I’m thinking, well, how will that hurt Al Gore? I mean, the Clinton scandals didn’t even hurt Clinton.” (David Letterman)

Practice Makes Perfect: “Al Gore revealed he got in shape this year by lifting weights with his son on the campaign trail. There are other benefits. Working with dumbbells was the best possible way to prepare for a debate with George W. Bush.” (Argus Hamilton)

Nothing but Heartache: “The Supremes’ on-and-off-again reunion is off again. If the aging trio doesn’t get together soon, by the time they finally do, their famous ‘oohs’ and ‘aahs’ will be ‘oys’ and ‘veys.’ ” (Gary Greenfield)

Plain Speaking: “Maverick Republican candidate John McCain announced he’s dropping out of the presidential race, and a spokesman for John McCain said, ‘Hey, anybody looking for a good spokesman?’ ” (Craig Kilborn)

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