This Play Carries Some Heavy Luggage
Ticket-buyers for “Re: LAX--Stories From an Airport,” a stage production set in an LAX departure area, will feel as if they’re going on a flight themselves.
“When you buy a ticket for our play, it’ll be inside an airline ticket jacket,” said G. Bruce Smith, one of five authors who contributed to the production at the 2100 Square Feet Theater in midtown L.A.
“We’re going to have someone in the lobby begging people for money, just like at the airport. There’ll be a security person checking people through. And there’ll be a speech by two flight attendants who will show where the bathrooms are inconveniently located.”
What about food for the spectators / passengers?
“No, we’re not going to do that,” Smith said, “though we did consider giving people popcorn in barf bags.”
EYE-CATCHING ADS: For today’s selections (see accompanying):
* George Elsom Sr. of Palm Springs saw an opening for car dealers that joked about what the job entails (at least I think it was a joke).
* J.S. Brattain of Gardena came across a car insurance blurb for commuters in a hurry (a spokesman for the company couldn’t explain to me why the word “speed” was in the ad).
* And Roger Fretwell of Belmont Shore saw an ad for a device that he says would be ideal for certain trailer parks.
FREEWAY HOBBYISTS: I’ve seen and heard of reports of drivers occupied on the freeway with playing a trumpet, pecking away at a laptop computer or playing with a bird on the steering wheel. But, on my Friday freeway commute on the 605, I saw a new performance. The driver of an erratically moving car was reading a script that she had balanced on the steering wheel. And, of course, she had to drive with her knees. Why? Well, she often found it necessary to accompany her dramatic lines with gestures.
THE SPIRIT OF GORDON GECKO: Prospective contestants who call Fox’s “Greed” TV show hear recorded information that concludes, “Have a greedy day!”
ATTENTION “GREED” WINNERS: Dick Harmon saw a sign in San Juan Capistrano for homes that were priced “from the low $1,000.000s.”
THE CLIPPERS OF THE ARENA LEAGUE: Remember the taste-challenged billboards of L.A.’s new Arena League football team that polluted the streets? There was the one teaser that proclaimed that “eight Oklahoma tourists” would be “beaten in downtown Los Angeles.”
It was a reference to the Oklahoma Wranglers, an opponent of the L.A. Avengers.
Well, the Wranglers seem to be pretty good at defending themselves. They’ve walloped the Avengers by scores of 59-33 and 65-44 in their two regular-season meetings.
The Avengers, whose record is 0-5, have more to avenge with each succeeding week.
BAD CONNECTION: Mention was made here of the GTE customer who had trouble halting service because of an 8-cent bill credit. That drew a letter from M.F. Amantullah of L.A., who after weeks of trying to stop service, was sent a check by GTE for one cent.
“It will cost me more to process the check, since I have a ‘per item’ charge at my bank for my account,” Amantullah said. “So I’m just keeping it as a reminder of what bureaucracy can do!”
That’s the best revenge, I think. Can you imagine how it will just drive the GTE bookkeepers crazy to have that 1-cent check in limbo?
miscelLAny:
The story about playwright Arthur Miller’s being spotted by an old classmate (“Artie, Artie Miller!”) reminded film historian Lee Harris about the time mimic Rich Little spotted Joseph Cotten in a bank. “Little said, ‘Pardon me, aren’t you Joseph Cotten?’ in the actor’s own voice. Cotten drolly snarled, ‘No, but apparently you are.’ ”