LAUGH LINES

Into the Groove: “George W. Bush and Al Gore met in the first of three presidential debates recently, and to say it was uneventful is an understatement. . . . Rather than address the issues directly, these guys danced around more than the regulars on ‘Soul Train.’ ” (Ira Lawson)

Wise Up: “Some people think that [George W. Bush] is not smart enough for the job. Today they asked him about RU-486, and he thought it was a character from ‘Star Wars.’ ” (Jay Leno)

Easy Street: “George W. Bush and Al Gore debated [recently]. . . . After . . . the Olympic sob stories, Americans were grateful to watch two competitors who have had it easy all their lives.” (Argus Hamilton)

Wishy-Washy: “Al Gore . . . used to be pro-life, now he’s pro-choice. He use to be anti-gun control, now he is pro-gun control. He said he invented the Internet, now he says ‘No,’ he didn’t. Forget [George W.] Bush, we should have Gore come out and debate himself.” (Leno)

Relating to the People: “The State Department ordered 10,000 Liberians out of the country. The candidates were asked about it. Al Gore refused comment, but George W. Bush said he sympathized because his wife was a Liberian before she became a teacher.” (Hamilton)

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