So Much for Noble Gestures

In case you didn’t notice, one of the gifts that President Clinton carried out of the White House was from the king of La Habra.

That would be Paul Goldenberg, the owner of Paul’s TVs, whose ubiquitous radio commercials end with the declaration, “I am the king!” His Highness, a donor to Democratic Party causes, gave Clinton about $3,000 worth of TV equipment. It’s one of the gifts that Clinton has said he will either pay for or donate to the White House.

I phoned Goldenberg on Monday and left a message but didn’t hear back. That’s the thanks I get when I was trying to give the king something--my idea of enlisting Clinton to narrate a Paul’s radio spot (“I was the prez!”).

ON THE ROAD: At a tour bus stop in New Zealand, Marcia Hensel Miller spotted a hair-raising sign (see photo).

DOES THE PARKING LOT ATTENDANT ACCEPT CREDIT CARDS? Parking is evidently getting tighter at that big school in Westwood, as William Hoppe of Malibu discovered when he read a form he received from UCLA Medical Plaza (see accompanying).

READ THE SMALL PRINT: Bev Mulligan of Hawthorne came upon a flashlight guarantee from Pelican Products of Torrance that excluded three sources of catastrophe (see accompanying).

JUST WHAT THE VULCAN ORDERED: Correcting a Paramount Pictures announcement about an appearance by Leonard Nimoy on TV’s “Becker,” the PRNewswire said, “All references of ‘Dr. Spock’ should read ‘Mr. Spock’ rather than ‘Dr. Spock’ as originally issued.”

SCARY ROAD SIGHTS: Bill Ruddiman of Laguna Niguel was stopped at a red light when he noticed a 70ish driver “who had taken a pair of binoculars from her purse and was focusing them on the street signs. Needless to say, I skedaddled out of her way as soon as the light changed.”

SAY IT AIN’T SO, PAT! In “The End of the Age,” a novel by televangelist Pat Robertson, a meteor crash off the coast of California submerges the Southland under 5,000 feet of water.

A Laguna Niguel woman becomes one of the few survivors because she grabs a plane out just before the big splash. On her flight, she meets a member of the Lakers and feels sadness “that the Lakers and basketball and Los Angeles would soon be things of the past.”

Robertson’s 1995 potboiler has the disaster occurring in the year 2000, so it seems silly now. Or does it?

Recent events have me wondering if the clever Robertson was speaking in symbolic terms. Was he actually prophesying that the disaster befalling the Lakers would be . . . the feud between teammates Shaquille O’Neal and Kobe Bryant?

Hope this thought doesn’t ruin the rest of your week.

miscelLAny:

Joe Shea of Hollywood saw an article on a traffic backup that quoted a rep of the Caltrans Traffic Management Center, Dominick Dulay.

Shea said Dulay was the most appropriate name he’d come across since his hometown constable. Imagine if you were a bad guy trying to evade Sheriff Ketcham.

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083; by fax at (213) 237-4712; by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012; and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.