Vandals Are on the Lam After an Attack on Fullerton’s Synthetic Sheep

If that doesn’t bleat all: The 30 fiberglass sheep created by artists in Fullerton are being watched over by some shepherds with badges: local police. The plainclothes officers were assigned to make spot checks on the tourist attractions after a dozen of the creatures were vandalized in the downtown area over the last month.

Fullerton Police Sgt. Danny Hughes said the assailants broke off some of the animals’ ears and even stole a hat that one wore.

“Grheepe,” a work by R. Peterson, suffered a different indignity in the courtyard of the Cellar Restaurant. “Someone broke the tongue off,” said owner Ernest Zingg (see photo of “Grheepe” in happier days).

One man was arrested, Hughes said, after he allegedly lopped off a sheep earlobe and, with the assistance of two other men, dragged the sculpture into the traffic on Harbor Boulevard.

Why the attacks? Well, as Hughes pointed out, “There are at least four small bars in the downtown area.”

When Post-It notes aren’t enough: The other day I wrote about Long Beach resident Ski Demski, who has his physicians’ phone numbers tattooed on his chest (including one that later had to be red-lined, literally, because it was outdated).

David Allen of Ontario was reminded of the main character in the suspense movie “Memento,” who had his body covered by tattoos with clues to his wife’s killer; he needs them because he has no short-term memory since the attack.

Writes Allen: “Demski, who had one phone number wrong on his chest, may have gotten off easy, though. It’s strongly implied that the ‘Memento’ character has all his facts wrong.”

And doesn’t even feel sheepish.

Shirt off his back: Demski, by the way, was invited to speak on patriotism to an elementary school the other day. (He’s in the Guinness Book of Records as the owner of the world’s largest flag, 505 by 255 feet).

But Demski’s appearance was delayed because officials made him change his shirt, which was deemed inappropriate.

Ski, may I suggest you also tattoo this reminder on your chest:

“Never wear a Hooters T-shirt to a grade school.”

Food for thought: I was heartened to hear that there’s talk of restoring Little Tokyo’s Far East Cafe (see photo), the landmark that looked as if it was left over from a 1940s noir movie, with its neon sign, wooden partitions, ancient ceiling fans and tight-lipped waiters.

The Far East, which served what the L.A. Downtown News called “a Japanese-Americanized version of Chinese food,” has been dark since the 1994 Northridge quake. But the newspaper says there are plans to restore its 92-year-old building.

Fittingly, the Far East was featured in the 1975 version of Raymond Chandler’s “Farewell My Lovely” in a scene in which private eye Philip Marlowe (Robert Mitchum) is unexpectedly confronted by a massive ex-con named Moose Malloy.

As narrator Marlowe puts it, “A dark shadow fell over my chop suey.”

miscelLAny: I can’t really classify these as weekend dining tips. But Charlotte Fournier of Laguna Woods came upon a listing of crabs that seem to have ingested a mind-altering substance. And Mark Dorfman of Santa Ana found an error that the American Kennel Club would not appreciate, doggone it (see accompanying).