Reading Between Marquee Lines Reveals What Women Want

At a Ventura movie complex, Pamela Spencer of Thousand Oaks noticed a twin bill that also sounded like a philosophical statement:

WHAT WOMEN WANT

RUGRATS

Spencer points out that some women would be more likely to agree with a marquee that read:

WHAT WOMEN WANT

CHOCOLAT

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WELL, IT BEATS A RECALL ATTEMPT: “Apparently one business owner thinks that I need repairs,” Whittier Mayor Allan Zolnekoff wrote of a local shop’s banner (see photo).

“Since I’m a rapidly aging 47-year-old elected official, I appreciate the 20%-off deal.”

Zolnekoff added that although he “rarely falls down,” he was tempted to take the shop up on its offer of “free speed balance.”

And speaking of deals, you and I know people who seem to get all the breaks. Well, maybe that’s because they got a deal at the shop that Bob Barnes of La Crescenta spotted (photo).

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STUPID DRIVER TRICKS: On the Santa Ana Freeway, Glenn Donofrio found himself “behind an individual whose driving indicated a cell phone was in use. I passed him on his right and I glanced over from my pickup to sneer and mutter some epithet.”

That’s when Donofrio noticed that the guy was not only talking into a cell phone held to his right ear but occasionally flipped the microphone part of a hands-free head-set to talk into a second cell phone.

That wasn’t enough to keep him occupied, though. The driver also held “a palm-sized computer in his left hand and was punching keys with his thumb.” Added Donofrio: “I never did see him grab the steering wheel.”

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THIRD IDEA: Here’s a third theory on the recently sighted MDRNARK license plate on an SUV. “Cripes, it’s so obvious,” said Robin Elliott of Long Beach. “The SUV was on the Santa Monica Freeway, wasn’t it? It wasn’t a modern ark, nor was it a doctor and nurse from Arkansas. It was an undercover police officer from Marina del Rey.”

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.