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LAUGH LINES

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Dead On: “The murder rate in New York is down. . . . But it’s always low this time of year, and then it tends to go back up in the springtime because the snow melts and they find a lot of bodies.” (David Letterman)

A Persistent Force: “James Carville of CNN, which is now the Clinton News Network, said he didn’t worry about Bill Clinton because Bill is the Comeback Kid. . . . Here is my question: How can you make a comeback when you won’t go away?” (Jay Leno)

Getting Teary: “Former Atty. Gen. Janet Reno signed with a New York City speakers bureau to give speeches about her years in the Clinton administration. . . . When she gives a speech, there’s never a dry eye in the house. It’s the tear gas.” (Argus Hamilton)

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A Pretty Penny: “How can you tell Hannibal is a Hollywood agent? He takes 10% right off the top.” (Alex Kaseberg)

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Got a joke? Send it to Laugh Lines by fax, (213) 237-0732, or mail, Southern California Living, Los Angeles Times, 202 W. 1st St., Los Angeles, 90012.

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