At Home With Rod Stewart

As cars approached the circular driveway in front of Rod Stewart’s baroque Italianate estate in Beverly Park on a recent evening, two men in kilts saluted every arrival with a bleat of their bagpipes.

Inside the mansion, the little rocker with the big hair showed off his art collection--pre-Raphael knights and fair ladies on every wall.

“It’s the first time that I’ve done this,” Stewart said, referring to the fund-raiser he was hosting. “I’m such a private person.”

Nearby, Chris Noth encouraged Kelsey Grammer to have a look at the library--thousands of volumes (Oscar Wilde, Charles Dickens, Plutarch’s Lives)--and framed photos of Stewart as soccer dad on every table.

When Andre Agassi walked by, Grammer flung himself around his neck before completing his tour of the house. “Wow, how about that,” the “Frasier” star kept saying. “That’s something.”

Arnold Schwarzenegger seemed to share the sentiment.

“This is a nice home,” Schwarzenegger remarked as he arrived with Maria Shriver. “Compared to this, we live like cotton pickers in the field.”

Some guests, anticipating a scene, had brought cameras to document their visit.

One man on the balcony got a call on his cell phone. “Honey,” the man next to him joked, “we’re at Rod’s house. I don’t know that we’ll call back.”

As the 150 guests sat down for a dinner prepared by Wolfgang Puck, Camryn Manheim took the stage to introduce Schwarzenegger, who was being honored by the evening’s organizers. “I’m such a Democrat,” she joked, “I can’t even say his name.” The evening, she said, would benefit the actor’s charity of choice: “children with underdeveloped biceps.”

In reality, the evening benefited a variety of children’s charities, including Schwarzenegger’s Inner-City Games Foundation. Schwarzenegger (a Republican candidate, or not, for governor in 2004) got bipartisan best wishes.

Hillary and Bill Clinton sent their love, as did Bush pere, who also offered a special presidential approval of “Frasier.” “Of course, Kelsey, two Presidents Bush are Kelsey Grammer fans,” the Bush letter printed in the program said. (Grammer was another of the evening’s honorees.)

During the event’s auction, Agassi became a big bidder, buying a Bruce Springsteen guitar for $9,000 and baseball memorabilia for $12,000.

One of the costliest items, three holes of golf with Bill Clinton, went for $35,000.

Afterward, Eric McCormack introduced Grammer. “I’ve been quite impressed by the way Kelsey conducts his life,” comedic beat, “lately.” Referring to the Emmys, McCormack noted: “Taking Kelsey out of the best actor category is like taking God out of the Pledge of Allegiance.”

McCormack then read the inscription on the small sculpture that had been handed to Grammer. It was a music award originally presented to Stewart in 1993, as someone had forgotten the real awards, and pilfered the rocker’s awards cabinet for a substitute.

“It’s a pleasure to receive that,” Grammer said.

When Red Buttons was introduced, Shriver jumped to her feet, giving him a standing ovation.

Buttons, with characteristic delivery, surveyed the grounds. “What a dump,” he said, before listing those unable to make the party.

“Mike Ovitz, who’s recovering from a vicious gay mafia drive-by slapping, couldn’t attend.” Buttons then ripped into Steven Spielberg, Oliver Stone, Madonna, Michael Jackson and Anna Nicole Smith. A man in a gray suit held onto the edge of the bar as tears of laughter ran down his cheeks.

As the evening drew to a close, guests lined up for their cars outside, with a couple of guests discussing how best to armor your limo. There was the usual end-of-evening flurry of business cards. One security guy pressed his card into Grammer’s palm, offering his services.

Nearby, Schwarzenegger chatted about the event.

“I feel like such a beginner,” he said, before being whisked away in a Jeep with Shriver and Danny DeVito.

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Post-Emmy Parties

Most celebrities left the television academy’s Governors Ball early after the 54th Emmy Awards, no doubt headed to West Hollywood to party-hop. The palatial room was nearly empty of A-listers by 10 p.m. But Ray Romano stayed much later, gold statuette in hand, savoring his best comedy actor win. He waded through throngs of well-wishers who swarmed him, despite attempts by event staff to keep them back. Afterward, Romano headed to the HBO party at Spago, joining Conan O’Brien, Kim Cattrall and Alan Ball. Also at the HBO party were more than 30 World War II veterans, celebrating the “Band of Brothers” Emmy win with Tom Hanks and Steven Spielberg. On Sunset Boulevard, at the “Entertainment Tonight” party held at the Mondrian hotel, Matthew Perry celebrated the “Friends” Emmy win, while David Hyde Pierce went straight for the bar.

“I spent a lot of time working out,” he said, “what I want now is a martini.”

Also at the party, sponsored by Glamour magazine, were Christian Slater, Owen Wilson, Rachel Hunter, Dr. Phil, Penny Marshall and Paula Abdul. Kelly Osbourne commandeered an NBC crew while brother Jack tried to persuade women to jump into the pool. As Oprah arrived, David Allen Grier cried out to her, “Marry me!”

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Sightings:

Anthony Kiedis of the Red Hot Chili Peppers trying on sunglasses at a pre-Emmy bash at the Chateau Marmont on Friday....Debra Messing admiring a 12-carat oval-shaped bauble at another pre-Emmy party at Mr. Chow’s. “When I see diamonds this big,” she said, “I start shaking.”

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Quote/Unquote:

“It’s hard raising kids in L.A.; it’s spread out and kids tend to gravitate to what is bad. My son went through his wanna-be gang member thing. He decided he wanted to be a Crip, walked around in blue, with the collar up--mind you, we live in a gated community in Beverly Hills. He’s the only member of the chapter Beverly Hills Crips.... [The neighbors] all thought he was the gardener, they wondered, ‘Why is the gardener so angry?’ “--Actor-comedian Damon Wayans on raising his kids today on “The Caroline Rhea Show.”