Group Helps Victims of Abuse Break the Cycle

Eliza’s senior year in high school was filled with fear. She recalls her ex-boyfriend’s controlling her every movement, practicing martial arts on her, leaving her with bruises and scrapes. Her grades dropped, and she quit participating in theater and soccer. Her acceptance to UC Santa Cruz was revoked.

“I missed a lot of school because I was too scared to go,” said the articulate 20-year-old, who did not want her last name used. “I didn’t know where to go or what to do.”

Finally, during a doctor’s visit, she learned about Break the Cycle, a nonprofit organization that provides free and confidential legal advice, advocacy and representation to victims of emotional and physical abuse.

About 550 youths received legal help from the group this year. A staff attorney listened to Eliza’s story and then helped her get a three-year restraining order against her ex-boyfriend.

In addition to legal services, Break the Cycle also connects the youths with shelters and support groups, and serves as a nationwide resource center on domestic violence.

“It’s not just about handing somebody a restraining order,” said Jessica Aronoff, director of programs and policy. “It’s about empowering them so they know they have rights, and so they know they can choose to take action to protect themselves.”

The organization began in Los Angeles in 1996, and recently opened offices in New York and San Francisco. Most clients are women ages 16 to 22, and many are either pregnant or have young children.

Break the Cycle also runs a prevention program, teaching students about dating and domestic violence and training school counselors and law enforcement officers on how to respond.

The organization received a $15,000 grant this year from the Los Angeles Times Holiday Campaign, which raises money for nonprofits in Los Angeles, Orange, Riverside, San Bernardino and Ventura counties.

The youths who go to Break the Cycle’s Los Angeles office are experiencing relationships in very adult ways, but don’t have the experience to know what is healthy and what is abusive, Aronoff said.

Some are terrified and crying, while others are fed up and angry. Each client has a terrible story to tell.

Abra, 18, who is pregnant with twins, said she was sexually assaulted by the babies’ father, who also bought a gun and threatened to kill her.

Cynthia, 16, said her ex-boyfriend repeatedly abused her, throwing her against a concrete wall and slamming her against a wooden cabinet.

Break the Cycle helped both young women obtain restraining orders.

In exchange for the services, the women are encouraged to give back to Break the Cycle by writing an article for its newsletter, speaking to a school group or creating artwork for the office.

Eliza has given back by sharing her experience in a promotional video and speaking at a fund-raiser.

Even after she got the restraining order, Eliza said, it took a while to get her life on track and to stop blaming herself for what had happened.

Now Eliza is in her second year at the Art Institute of Los Angeles, and is determined not to get involved in another abusive relationship.

“I know what I deserve now,” she said. “I almost had to have everything taken away from me to start fresh and rebuild. Each day, it’s getting better and better.”

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