Nowhere to Go but Down for Brown

Washington Post columnist Tony Kornheiser, who has known Larry Brown since they attended summer camp together in the 1950s, has a theory why the Detroit Piston coach changes jobs so frequently.

“Because players get sick of him in just a few years; they see him as too rigorous,” Kornheiser wrote. “It’s just as well, because Larry usually hates half the players the day he gets there, and the other half by the end of the season.

“Larry really should be coaching high school; I think that’s where he’ll finish up. He’s a teacher first. The pros don’t want to be taught; they think they already know everything. And college kids stay just long enough to be pros.”

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Trivia time: City Section champion Chatsworth High (35-0) was ranked No. 1 in USA Today’s final national baseball poll Thursday. Who is Chatsworth’s most famous baseball alumnus? Hint: He had a 20-year major league career, all but one spent with the Boston Red Sox.

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Mr. Sensitivity: When Bill Parcells referred to trick plays as “Jap plays” this week, it wasn’t the first time the Dallas Cowboy coach had stuck his foot in his mouth with an offensive comment, wrote Greg Cote of the Miami Herald:

“Parcells once intentionally referred to one of his malingering receivers, Terry Glenn, as ‘she.’ Now why would the coach want to insult women like that?”

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Crowd pleaser: The minor league Toledo Mud Hens designate a visiting player as the “strikeout player of the game” and give away ice cream to fans whenever he strikes out. Recently that player was All-Star shortstop Nomar Garciaparra, who was rehabilitating an injury with the Pawtucket Red Sox.

After he struck out twice, Garciaparra told the Boston Globe, “That’s what I’m trying to do for the fans -- make sure I take care of them.”

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Reality TV: Rick Morrissey of the Chicago Tribune, on a proposed show starring O.J. Simpson: “The idea would be for him to yell, ‘You’ve been Juiced!’ after he pulls a practical joke. ‘And I’m not even bleeding!’ is expected to be the most likely reply from good-natured victims.”

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Sore point: Club owner Bill Davidson is going for his third championship within a year with the Pistons, after his Tampa Bay Lightning won the Stanley Cup on Monday and his Detroit Shock won the WNBA championship last season.

But not all of Davidson’s moves have been good ones, Tom FitzGerald of the San Francisco Chronicle pointed out: “I’d feel better about him if he hadn’t once fired Dick Vitale as Pistons coach, unleashing him on our ears.”

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Net result: Responding to news that Hall of Fame hockey goalie Ken Dryden is running for the Canadian Parliament, Dwight Perry of the Seattle Times wrote, “If he’s the 21st century Harry S. Truman, the puck stops here.”

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Trivia answer: Outfielder Dwight Evans.

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And finally: The Williams sisters’ misfortune at the French Open prompted this observation from Bill Scheft of Sports Illustrated: “Serena had 45 unforced errors against Jennifer Capriati. Forty-six, if you count her outfit.”