Off-roading for dummies

If you want to flog a new Ferrari, you head for the cedar-ribbed roads of Tuscany. If you want to air out a new Porsche 911, you make for the separate reality of Germany’s autobahn, where knuckles are pale and right thighs ache and the Black Forest rushes past at 300 feet per second.

The latest minivan? The jungles of Tarzana.

An all-new Land Rover calls for something even more exotic -- not a road at all, but the absence of road. Here in the wild vacancies of northern Scotland, less is moor.

This ancient, roaming terrain is a bonny challenge to any 4x4: black-green slate as slick as a dragon’s mossy scales; lochs rimmed with polished boulders; rivers hip-deep and cold; and, most unexpectedly, white sand on the North Sea shore, as fast and deep and sugary as a Bahamian beach.

It’s an excellent locale for the press introduction of the Land Rover LR3, a seven-seat, full-size SUV that contains the biggest advance in off-roading technology in a decade: the Terrain Response system.

With a large rotary knob in the LR3’s central console, Terrain Response can be set to one of five 4X4 modes: normal; snow-grass-gravel; mud and ruts; sand; and rock crawl (note the similarity to Scottish cuisine).

These modes correspond to pre-programmed settings in the vehicle’s computer, affecting the locking center and rear differentials; the four-wheel traction, stability and anti-lock brake systems; throttle response and gear shift points; suspension height, hill descent control, and other parameters. These logarithms were derived from studying terrain characteristics -- the frictional coefficient of wet grass, for instance -- but in a larger sense they represent the accumulated groupthink of Land Rover’s half-century of off-road driving experience.

The effect is to digitally supply off-road chops that would otherwise take years to develop. It makes off-roading a no-brainer. We will return to the question of how important that is.

For example, in rock-crawl mode, the vehicle rises 2 inches on its air-spring suspension for greater ground clearance and improved approach and departure angles. The powertrain engages the low-speed transfer case, which multiplies torque at the wheels, the better to pull the vehicle over obstacles. Rock-crawl mode also locks the center and rear differential, so that all the wheels have virtually the same power routed through them -- important because, over large rocks, one or more of the vehicle’s tires may not be in contact with the ground. The system also retards throttle response to avoid sudden surges of power in conditions that call for more delicacy and balance than force.

And to make it all clear to you, the LR3 features an animated display (in the navigation panel) illustrating the status of the powertrain: which diffs are locked and for how long, as well as steering angles, suspension height, wheel slippage, traction, ABS pulsing and other data.

In ordinary SUVs, such as the highly capable Toyota Land Cruiser, the driver needs to know when and where to lock the rear and center diffs, and must learn by long and sometimes bitter experience how to modulate the throttle and brakes to pick through obstacles. With the Land Rover, most of the expert-system work has been done for you.

The LR3 is the first all-new vehicle from Land Rover since Ford purchased the company in 1999. It replaces the Discovery, a dogged but dated 4x4 that continues to sell well in the States, despite its reputation for dodgy reliability and its relatively cramped quarters. What the Discovery has going for it is its gallant British styling, lovely interior and case-hardened chassis.

The LR3 is bigger -- 14 inches longer in wheelbase and 5 inches more overall length, slightly wider and a wee bit lower. The extra distance between front and rear allows for the addition of a proper third row of seats, easily accessible behind the second-row tilt-and-tumble seats.

The rear two seats fold flat into the cargo floor, as do the second-row seats (a 35-30-35 bench arrangement). Stow all the seats in the floor and you create a cavernous 90 cubic feet of cargo space, more than a Chevy Tahoe.

You might suspect that this family friendly configuration -- and the available embarrassment of cup holders, auxiliary sound outlets and controls, cubbies, secondary air vents, rear skylights, and a central console drink cooler -- is an effort to pander to American SUV buyers, for whom off-road means drive-in theater. And you would be right. The LR3 will be the company’s core product in years to come, and its ladder-frame/unit-body construction will supply the bones for the next four Land Rover products, including the coming-soon Range Rover Sport. It has to be a hit in the U.S.

The LR3 is barnacled with conveniences and optional amenities -- road-following bi-xenon headlamps; navigation system; 600-watt Harman-Kardon sound system; rain-sensing wipers, and on and on. All of this hardware means the LR3 keeps pace with such show ponies as the Lexus RX 330 and Acura MDX.

To which I say, very nice, but who cares?

Like Ferrari, Land Rover’s soul has a relatively narrow bandwidth. The company’s entire reason for being is to make the best off-road vehicles available. So, for me, the fact that the LR3 is a big seven-passenger luxury SUV with all the bells, whistles, kettledrums and fluegelhorns they could wave a baton at, well, I just don’t care that much. There are many hip-wader limos on the market, including showpieces such as the VW Touareg and the Volvo XC90.

You want fast? The BMW X5 4.4i or the Porsche Cayenne S is more your speed. The Jaguar-derived 4.4-liter V8 under the clamshell hood of the LR3 produces 300 horsepower and 315 pound-feet of torque, sluiced through the ZF six-speed transmission. Those are respectable numbers, thwarted by an even more respectable number: 5,796 -- the poundage of the LR3. Zero to 60 mph takes about 10 seconds and the highway passing power thins out at about 80 mph.

Pulchritude? The LR3 is half-right, the half that mimics the handsome architectural face of the Range Rover. I’m not sure I can endorse the rest of the vehicle, which looks like a large gourmet freezer to me.

Neither do I think that the vehicle’s interior, as overrun with amenities as it is, offers quite the limbic satisfaction of the premium VW or the Volvo. For instance, wood is not an option, even on the HSE package, and there is none of the contrasting upholstered welting found in the Range Rover or even the Discovery.

As for driving dynamics, the LR3’s double-wishbone, air-suspension legs are certainly capable enough on road. The vehicle has a fairly pronounced but well-contained body roll, and there are no ugly surprises on the other side of a standard avoidance maneuver. Ride quality is stately and smooth, and the cabin is superbly quiet. Build quality in the early production models I drove in Scotland was impeccable.

I commend Land Rover’s unstinting generosity with regard to equipment and features, but what makes my blood sing is how well this thing goes off road.

Finally, an SUV I can trust in the bush. The LR3 has a 37-degree approach angle, a 29-degree departure angle and a 36-degree lateral incline angle. It’s got a 28-inch fording depth, though in Scotland I drove through water up to the door handles.

So it’s less couture than wash and wear, less Armani Exchange than Explorer Scout. I want to jump stumps. I want to tractor across 4-foot-deep fire lines. I want to drive to my castle by the loch and sit by the fire with my kilt on, warming my haggis.

You take the high road. Or take the low road, if you like. Me? I dinna need a rood a’tall.

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Automotive critic Dan Nei lcan be reached at dan.neil@latimes.com.

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(BEGIN TEXT OF INFOBOX)

2005 Land Rover LR3

Base price: $44,995

Price, as tested: $49,995

Powertrain: 4.4-liter overhead cam engine, six-speed automatic transmission, electronic locking center and rear differential, full-time four-wheel drive

Horsepower: 300 at 5,500 rpm

Torque: 315 pound-feet at 4,000 rpm

Length: 190.8 inches

Wheelbase: 113.5 inches

Curb weight: 5,796 pounds

Competitors: Toyota Land Cruiser, VW Touareg, Volvo XC90

Final thoughts: Like Scottish food, lots of guts