Jury duty is just like a first date

NOT long ago I served on a jury, and as my eyelids began to flicker during a particularly long, repetitive stretch of testimony, I couldn’t help but be reminded of some first dates I’ve been on.

After all, jury duty involves sitting in a large room with a lot of other people, not knowing whether you will be selected to serve or be sent home. You raise a hand and ask the person in charge how we will know we’ve been chosen. “I’ll call you,” is the reply.

“I’ll call you”?

Do any three words capture the flavor of the dating experience better than those? It’s no different in the jury pool. You sit there waiting for the call, wondering, hoping, telling yourself you don’t care. “So what if I splurged on a new outfit!” you think. “So what if I got my nails done specially!”

If you are chosen to go upstairs to a courtroom (“He called me! I knew he would!”), you then face jury selection, during which the attorneys ask you questions so they can get to know you better, just like on a first date.

Do you have children? What kind of work do you do? Has anyone in your family been

tried for a violent crime? You might as well be meeting over coffee.

Inevitably, several potential jurors are dismissed and exit

the courtroom. Those who

remain can’t help feeling a little bit smug, probably the same way that Miss Universe contestants feel when they make the finals.

Then the judge gives you instructions about things like rules of evidence and reasonable doubt. Rules of evidence essentially means that for any number of complicated, technical reasons, certain facts may be excluded from testimony no matter how crucial they might be to the verdict.

Does this remind you at all of dating? When I served as a juror, the facts we were not permitted to hear pertained to a certain sequence of events involving a handgun and a washing machine. (Don’t ask.)

In the case of a budding relationship, there are any number of technicalities that the rules of evidence might exclude from first-date testimony -- for example, “Technically, I’m still married.”

The concept of reasonable doubt also applies to romance. You must decide whether you’re grossed out beyond a reasonable doubt -- the doubt involving mitigating factors such as a cute smile.

One of the biggest challenges a juror faces is staying alert and focused during testimony. Is that a dating hot button or what? How many times have you sat opposite someone at dinner while she told you anecdotes about her cat, and then you realized belatedly that your mind had wandered and you had no idea how to reply appropriately.

During this trial I did my best to pay attention to every word, knowing I would be expected to make an educated decision about the defendant’s fate.

Unfortunately, I have always been handicapped by a tendency to daydream, and I’m afraid my mind wandered along its usual paths -- like wondering what the HBO voice-over guy looks like. He sounds so hot when he says “Groundbreaking. Critically acclaimed. Smash hits.”

Ultimately the process is a good exercise in sharpening your senses for that next big encounter.

Unless you’re the judge. He fell asleep during the trial.

Leni Fleming can be reached at weekend@latimes.com.

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