Either Way, There Was a Mad Dash to Cover

Severe thunderstorms wiped out most of the opening-night schedule at the U.S. track and field championships Thursday in Indianapolis, and delayed the competition again Sunday.

Carroll Stadium was evacuated each time because of lightning and heavy rain, leaving fans and competitors to take refuge in nearby parking garages and other structures.

Just wondering ... when a stadium is evacuated during a track meet, do officials say, “On your marks, get set, go!”?

Trivia time: Who was Major League Baseball’s first $100,000 bonus baby when he signed with the Pittsburgh Pirates in 1950?

Red-flagging: Soccer fans who read the Denver Post know that Jim Armstrong rarely has anything nice to write about their sport. Among recent observations:

* “Latest, greatest oxymoron in sports: soccer analyst. If the match ends 0-0, which every other one seems to do, why would you need an analyst? This just in: Nothing happened!

* “I saw the other day where one of the players in the World Cup was questionable for a match with a hand injury. Excuse me? What do you need your hands for in soccer?

* “I’m not much of a kickball guy, but I wanted to take this opportunity to congratulate Team USA on those four shots attempted in three games. Four shots? Kobe Bryant takes that many during a timeout.”

Count it out: “For years they have been saying that because soccer is so popular in Europe one day it will be popular here too,” Jay Leno said. “Yeah, that worked out so well with the metric system.”

Firing up: During a parade in Miami to celebrate winning the NBA championship, 65 people suffered heat-related problems. That, wrote David Thomas in the Fort Worth Star-Telegram, “is a small total compared to the number of people in Dallas who suffered Heat-related problems.”

Explosive duo: Wrote Dwight Perry in the Seattle Times: “Rumor has it that U.S. military bigwigs can’t wait to meet Shaquille O’Neal and Dwyane Wade when the new NBA champs make their inevitable White House visit.

“Or, as Pentagon types now refer to the Miami Heat’s 1-2 punch: Shaq and Awe.”

Viddy this: Envisioning what the Bud Selig-ordered sensitivity training for flamboyant Chicago White Sox Manager Ozzie Guillen might entail, Dan Daly in the Washington Times wrote: “I’m picturing a kind of ‘Clockwork Orange’ scene -- a contraption holding his eyelids open, forcing him to watch ‘Brokeback Mountain.’ ”

Looking back: On this date in 1964, University of Wisconsin footballer Rick Reichardt signed with the Angels for $205,000, becoming the highest-paid “bonus baby” in baseball history.

Trivia answer: Lomita’s Paul Pettit, who was nicknamed the “Wizard of Whiff” at Harbor City Narbonne High, where he once recorded 89 strikeouts in 47 innings. In his third minor league start, Pettit hurt his elbow, and while trying to compensate, injured his shoulder.

And finally: Jerry Greene in the Orlando Sentinel suggested the next hottest NFL jersey name: “Ben Toothlessberger.”