Purpose Forged Out of Tragedy

As teen-savvy parents, David and Donna Sabet gave 17-year-old daughter Gillian the usual talk before she left for the dance.

“Call when you get where you’re going,” he said. “Be safe. Buckle up.”

“I know,” she replied. “Love ya, Dad!”

Gillian -- “Jill” to her friends -- and her boyfriend, Jonathan M. Schulte, 16, never made it to last year’s JSerra High School Spring Fling in San Juan Capistrano, where she was to be crowned queen of the dance.

The couple died when the Isuzu Rodeo they were riding in flipped several times on the San Joaquin Hills tollway in Irvine. Four other teens in the SUV were injured. The California Highway Patrol said the 16-year-old driver, who was not cited, took her eyes off the road to grab a pack of gum.

The Sabets of San Clemente say they hope their daughter’s tragedy will be the catalyst for a new movement that will keep teens safe on the road. Fund-raising for the program, JourneySafe, ramps up with a June 10 walk-a-thon at San Clemente High School. Organizers expect more than 300 walkers.

“People will forget Jill just like they forget the stories and the original mothers” from Mothers Against Drunk Driving, Donna Sabet said. “We don’t know who those kids were. But their message stayed.”

Gillian’s death “wasn’t a freak accident” as some described it, her mother said. “It was an entirely preventable accident. And that’s what we want to get people to understand, so that it doesn’t happen so often.”

JourneySafe encourages teens to pledge to be responsible drivers and passengers. For instance, drivers vow not to answer cellphones; passengers promise to be in charge of the car stereo and keep the driver focused.

Twelve of Gillian’s friends have volunteered to serve on the nonprofit’s board of advisors. So far, the volunteers have raised about $40,000.

The first JourneySafe campus club was founded this year at JSerra.

The Sabets said they want to spare other families the pain that has engulfed them.

“I still can’t take a deep breath without my heart hurting,” David Sabet said. “A lot of our cherished routines, like our holidays and our family gatherings, have just stopped because it’s so difficult to express joy when you’re so deeply broken.”

The Sabets also lost a son, Jonathan, 8, to cancer in 1991. He died three days before the birth of their third child, Jason, now 14.

Gillian’s presence can still be felt on campus.

“We just need to start changing the way you think about driving,” said Joanna Wiencek, 17, who had been friends with Gillian since the first grade. “You don’t need to do 50,000 other things and drive.”

A program like JourneySafe is something Gillian would have spearheaded, her parents said. And their daughter’s passion to help others has inspired them to press forward.

“There are times when we curl up and cry and there are times when we want to be the parents that she raised us to be,” David Sabet said. “I think the last thing Jill would want is to see us like this.”