Stern visits from the East and sees that it is good

Like Moses leading his people out of the wilderness where they’d wandered for years, Commissioner David Stern arrived Friday and gazed over the land of milk and honey . . .

Lakerdom.

“Well, you know, I do have 30 teams, 28 of whom are not the Lakers or the Celtics,” Stern protested mildly before the Lakers reduced the Clippers to their constituent parts in a 119-82 wipeout.

“Obviously, the Lakers and the Celtics have a special cachet because they’re associated with the Finals.

“So just the mere fact that both of them are playing at the top of their games -- but if the Bulls and Knicks were having breakout seasons, we’d be in similarly great shape.”

Actually, the Knicks are having a breakout season, or, at least, one that will never be forgotten.

Stern is entitled to squirm at the suggestion he roots for anyone, which is part and parcel of the Vast League Conspiracy Theory that’s peculiar to media coverage of the NBA and believed by players and coaches throughout the NBA.

Not that Stern did himself any favors one day during the Shaquille O’Neal-Kobe Bryant era when he was swapping lines on radio with ESPN’s Dan Patrick.

Patrick asked what Stern’s ideal matchup would be.

“The Lakers versus the Lakers,” Stern said.

Happily then for the league and local fans, after three barren seasons, Lakerdom is once more lush with promise.

Just to show how strange it had gotten around here . . .

Two seasons ago, with Phil Jackson starting his second tour and the Lakers recovering from their 34-48 nadir, the Clippers still won 47 games to their 45.

After the Clippers beat the Lakers in a regular-season game, Elton Brand sniffed, “We were better than them last year. We have to shoot for the teams above us.”

With the Lakers out in the first round, the Clippers carried on into the second where they were one stop at the end of Game 4 in Phoenix from taking a 3-1 lead.

Local TV ratings of the Clippers-Phoenix games were higher than the Lakers-Phoenix ratings in the first round.

Jack Nicholson even came to one of the Clippers games, not that they fell all over the big guy.

“We lost that double-overtime game in Phoenix with Jack Nicholson there,” Brand said, “so we’re not sure Jack will be invited back.”

Two years later, the Lakers have just gone back to being the Lakers and the Clippers have just gone back to being the Clippers.

“I’m discouraged by our injuries for sure,” Clippers Coach Mike Dunleavy before the game. “Other than that, they had a -- I don’t know how to put it the correct way -- they made a nice trade. I guess that’s the best way to say it.

“They made a nice trade [for Pau Gasol] and that trade has bungee-jumped them ahead of not only us but the rest of the league. The trampoline effect of that is extremely positive for them.

“And to call it like it is, it puts everybody else behind.”

The Lakers still have their issues, or will when Andrew Bynum gets back, which is now starting to look like mid-April as opposed to early April.

Before Friday’s game, Jackson raised the possibility that a return late in the regular season might see Bynum coming off the bench in the playoffs.

On the bright side for the Lakers, who put on another clinic in offense Friday, they may be the best team in the NBA now without their starting center.

With a restrained performance from Bryant, who took five shots in the first half, the Lakers shot 49%, easing into a 49-41 lead.

Then they warmed up in the third quarter when they dropped eight three-pointers on the Clippers, turning it into a laugher for everyone but the Clippers.

Dunleavy was asked afterward whether he’ll show his players the tape.

“Absolutely,” he said, bristling. “I may make them watch it two or three times.

“They’ve got us outmanned but it still comes down to busting it. I would have fouled out of that game, personally, rather than stay out there and get scored on.”

All in all, it was all Stern could have wished for. Even if he can’t say it in public anymore, his Lakers are back.

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mark.heisler@latimes.com