Mom calls on company time

Dear Amy: I’m in my 20s, and I work as a receptionist.

When my mother can’t reach me on my cellphone during business hours (I have it turned off), she calls my company’s office line.

Because I’m the one who answers the phone, she gets through.

She starts by saying, “Hi, I love you, this is just a quick thing,” but after about two minutes, she usually starts ranting about her co-workers or her sister who says hurtful things to her.

These are not topics I want to discuss at the front desk when I’m on the job. I feel put on the spot, sometimes right in front of our clients.

My mother is a teacher, and I wouldn’t expect her to answer the phone while she’s giving a lecture.

In the past, I’ve said things like, “Hey, Mom, the boss is standing right here, I’ve got to go.”

I’ve even said, “I don’t feel comfortable talking about this at the front desk.”

I’ve put her on hold to grab other calls, hoping she would get the hint.

She gets huffy and complains about “how busy everyone is.”

I tried making phone appointments with her, but she doesn’t like this either, because it’s too “formal.”

I love my mom, and when we do talk on the phone when I’m at home (which is at least twice a week), we have a great time. Sometimes we talk for hours.

But I work and volunteer, and my sister is in college, so, yes, we are busy -- in a good way.

Is this empty nest syndrome? Am I missing something? Am I being rude?

Your Thoughts

Dear Thoughts: I was also a receptionist at your age.

I’ll share something from the secret receptionist handbook: Never lie to your mother about why you need to get off the phone.

It’s unprofessional -- and moms tend to see through it.

Tell your mother that you can’t take personal calls at the front desk and that you’ll turn on your cellphone during your lunch hour.

Taking her calls compromises your ability to do your job, and your analogy of expecting her to talk to you while she was delivering a lecture is perfect.

If she calls and it’s not an emergency, you should quickly say, “I’m going to have to jump off; I’m on desk duty now. I’ll call you back, OK?”

Your mother may be going through a bad patch, and you should ask if she would like to talk about it -- outside working hours.

Send questions to Amy Dickinson by e-mail to askamy@tribune.com or by mail to Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611.