Choosing/Finding a Roommate
Most of us have seen the movie “Single White Female” and the idea of searching for a roommate can be challenging, scary and stressful. The thing is, you can’t afford to live on your own, the idea of staying at home with your parents is just not something you can handle any longer or you’re in a new city and rental costs are a little more than what you’ve bargained for. What to do? Here are a couple of ideas for you to help make this decision a little less intimidating.
Although your roommate might not instill a curfew on you, lock you out of the house if you break it or make you baby-sit, there are still some challenges with living with another person that you will need to overcome. If you’re not really a people person, or you really need a lot of privacy, or you have trouble talking through disputes, having a roommate might not be for you. Even if you live with a friend, your roommate’s problems may become yours. You’ll still need to share responsibilities (cleaning, bills, grocery shopping, etc.) and there may be times when there’s never enough privacy. If you’re ready to face the challenges and make a commitment to developing this relationship, you’re ready to choose your roommate.
The first thing you’ll need to decide is if you’ll live with a friend or a stranger. Although the idea of living with your best pal is quite appealing, living together can break the strongest bonds. Are you ready to lose the friend you’ve known since kindergarten or have you been through enough to know that any obstacle can be worked out? The little things that bother you now about your friend (she’s always whining about her boyfriend, he can’t go out without creating loud bodily sounds, she has a problem with borrowing things and never giving them back) will only get worse when you’re with each other 24/7. Even if you have the most fantastic relationship, there are things that go on behind closed doors that you will become all too privy to. Do you really want to know?
If you’re new to a city or you don’t have a friend that is ready, or who wants to, move into a new place, finding a “stranger” may be your only option. To avoid the crazy, stalker, moocher, leech type; approach this search in the same way you would approach a new job or finding a college. Ask questions, ask a lot of questions, both to your potential new roomie and to yourself:
• Are you a morning person or a night owl?
• What kind of music do you like?
• Do you party or do you like relaxing down time?
• What kind of people does your roommate hang out with?
• Do you like the same sports teams?
• How do you feel about visitors?
• Are you in a serious relationship? Are they?
• Do you share the same ideas about cleanliness? Are you a pig? Is your roommate neat freak?
• What are your hobbies? (If you play a musical instrument, for example, this information is a need to know for any potential roommate.)
• Do you or your potential roommate have or want pets? And if so, what kind are they? You probably wouldn’t want to bunk with an owner of a ferret if you’re an owner of a Doberman.
