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That dude-itude: Books for men

Perhaps it’s a sign of the post-post-metrosexual backlash, but book publishers seem to be busier than ever cranking out “man-uals” to help modern men talk, act and fix things the way our forefathers once did (from, say, the 1920s through 1980). We’ve compared a few of the more recent offerings to cross our desk.

The book: “Brocabulary: The New Man-i-festo of Dude Talk,” Daniel Maurer (October 2008, Collins Living: $14.95)

Who’s reading: Eighth-grade boys

Man-tra: Lame puns = male bonding

Mildly useful: “Alcofall”: an injury that occurs due to excessive alcohol consumption.

Don’t bother: “The Disadvantages of Manties (Man Panties)”

Idols: Brody Jenner, Seth (B)rogen

Um, really? “Fellabrate” means “to celebrate with the fellas,” and “chilliards” is a game of billiards played for the purposes of “chilling with your bros.”

Obligatory beer reference: the killing of a beer. (Collins Living)
The book: “The Retrosexual Manual: How to Be a Real Man,” Dave Besley (Prion: $24.95)

Who’s reading: Beer-swilling, emasculated rugby players in the U.K.

Man-tra: The 1970s = the Golden Age of Man

Mildly useful: Urinal etiquette (if only to avoid getting beaten to a pulp in the men’s room by a drunken Retrosexual)

Don’t bother: Recipes for a Retrosexual. Sample: “Curry — fry whatever you have and add some supermarket curry sauce.”

Idols: Steve McQueen, Michael Caine as Alfie

Um, really? “Foreplay — Get her to send a text when she’s ready. You’ll be down at the pub.”

Obligatory beer reference: “A retrosexual is permitted to drink the following beverages: beer, lager, whisky, vodka and a Bailey’s if someone has left it unfinished on the bar.” (Prion Books)
The book: “The Man Book: Booze, Boobs, and Baseball — a Kick-Ass Guide,” Otto DeFay (St. Martin’s Griffin: $12.95)

Who’s reading: Sports fans who consistently win bar trivia contests

Man-tra: Knowledge = power

Mildly useful: Ten things to say to ease the tension of your next prostate exam

Don’t bother: Chapter 1: “A Thousand Names for Your Penis”

Idols: Chuck Yeager, Wayne Gretzky

Um, really? Catwoman tops the list of “Hottest Animated Women” (beating out Jessica Rabbit — probably just by a whisker).

Obligatory beer reference: Top beer-drinking countries — the Czech Republic is No. 1. (St. Martin’s Griffin)
The book: “The Man’s Manual: Poker Secrets, Beer Lore, Waitress Hypnosis and Much, Much More!,” Gregg Stebben (Skyhorse Publishing: $12.95)

Who’s reading: Aspiring Mr. Fix-Its — there’s actually useful information in here.

Man-tra: Power tools = power

Mildly useful: How to clean a filthy fridge using a pickup truck and a carwash

Don’t bother: How to grow a huge, disgusting ball-shaped belly

Idols: MacGyver, Ty Pennington

Um, really? Learning how to swallow a sword involves learning how to swallow something called a “guiding tube.”

Obligatory beer reference: Lite beers have fewer calories than regular beer, but they’ll get you just as drunk and just as quickly. (Skyhorse Publishing)