Column: Another dim move by the Coastal Commission

If you saw the artist’s rendering of a streetlight illuminating a splash of ocean 200 yards off Laguna Beach, you probably smiled and thought, “Only in Laguna.”

The proposed installation by Pablo Vargas Lugo was random, whimsical and absolutely brilliant.

But it never came to be.

Lugo was reportedly on a boat from Newport Beach with his crew to install it when they were told to turn back by the California Coastal Commission.

Officially, the commission said the installation ran the risk of harming the environment.

Unofficially, the commission apparently doesn’t know Laguna Beach.

The installation was slated off Main Beach, just beyond the surf, in an area known for its nothingness.

Any scuba diver will tell you it’s a desert there: sandy, reefless and boring.

All Lugo wanted to do was set anchor, essentially, so the streetlight could stand like a metaphor.

Instead, the commission said no.

They claimed the art project was inconsistent with the rules of the Marine Protected Area.

Laguna Art Museum executive director Malcom Warner, trying to be diplomatic, said he was disappointed.

“As you might imagine, we were in unfamiliar regulatory territory with this particular piece, and have proceeded in the belief that with enthusiastic support from the city and the approvals we secured from the Coastal Commission, the [California] Department of Fish and Wildlife and the U.S. Coast Guard, we could safely go ahead,” he said.

After initial publication of this column online, a Coastal Commission spokeswoman said Friday that the commission and the Department of Fish and Game had not authorized the project.

“The organizers unfortunately did not have required reviews from State Lands or Fish and Wildlife,” said spokeswoman Noaki Schwartz. “As a result, the commission could not finalize the temporary event authorization. If they are able to satisfy these requirements, then we would be happy to talk to the applicant again about the potential authorization.”

The temporary installation, “Seascape,” was supposed to be one of the main attractions last weekend during the museum’s fifth annual Art & Nature festival, which included special exhibitions, lectures, panel discussions, films and other activities.

According to Lugo, the piece would have illustrated the juxtaposition of urban growth and scenic nature.

“The ever-changing seascape and a familiar element of urban infrastructure and growth, the streetlight, will come together, pinpointing a small section of the ocean as a seascape under observation and reminding viewers of the shifting conditions under which development and our future are taking form,” he said.

But none of that happened because a state agency with quasi-judicial authority doesn’t know how to get out of its own way.

A quick, reasonable review would have been fine, given the circumstances. To be fair, imagine what it sounded like: They want to do what? Where?

But it was backed by the Laguna Art Museum. Any 12-year-old Laguna surfer could tell you it was harmless.

And now you know why the public hates government bureaucracy. Now you know why there are executive orders.

With an annual budget of more than $16 million, one would think the executives at the Coastal Commission would have the wherewithal to make good, fair, timely decisions.

But that’s not the way they work.

Petulant comes to mind.

It’s as if they throw their weight around because they can — not because it’s right, but because they control the game.

The rules say Laguna waters are designated a State Marine Reserve; therefore, nobody can play.

Specifically, this area “prohibits damage or take of all marine resources (living, geologic or cultural) including recreational and commercial take,” according to the Department of Fish and Wildlife.

But the fact is you don’t have to be a marine biologist to know that Main Beach — for hundreds of yards into the ocean — is just a sandy drain basin.

Laguna Canyon Creek, such as it is, mucks up the shoreline during every storm. Why? Because it’s the outlet for the Laguna Coastal Streams Watershed, which covers 11 square miles of inland pollution.

All of it comes directly through Laguna Canyon and discharges into Main Beach.

The spotlight art project would not have harmed any sea creatures but instead would have highlighted the lovely trash and cigarette butts that float by due to a distracted California Coastal Commission.

If the commission is so concerned about the welfare of the ocean, maybe it should take more of an interest in cleaning up pollution under its watch.

“Trash pick-up is not a commission mandate, but for the last three decades the Commission has sponsored Coastal Clean Up Day — the largest annual volunteer event in the country,” Schwartz said in an email. “Through these events, this agency has coordinated the removal of millions of pounds of trash from our beaches and waterways. This is in addition to our Adopt a Beach program which coordinates beach clean ups year round, and our Dock Walker program which provides recycling opportunities for fishing gear and boating related discharges.

According to its own mission statement, “the commission is committed to protecting and enhancing California’s coast and ocean for present and future generations. It does so through careful planning and regulation of environmentally sustainable development, rigorous use of science, strong public participation, education and effective intergovernmental coordination.”

Rigorous science … strong public participation? Not even close.

In Laguna, pollutants frequently identified on the state’s bad list include metals, nitrogen, nutrients, indicator bacteria, pesticides and trash. Much of the Laguna Beach coastline is consistently listed for bacteria, second usually only to notorious Doheny Beach in Dana Point.

Schwartz, however, said that regulation of those pollutants do not fall into the Coastal Commission’s jurisdiction.

“Sediment loads and other TMDLS are the exclusive jurisdiction of the State and Regional Water Boards,” she said. “The Commission does not regulate discharges or set TMDLs.”

Furthermore, the four miles of upper Laguna Canyon Creek is listed for sediment toxicity, which is even worse, according to the 2013 Laguna Coastal Streams Watershed Workplan.

What all of this means is that the Coastal Commission has more to worry about than a temporary fiberglass streetlight, professionally built, properly secured and artistically badass.

Most people probably would have peered out at the light and believed it was a good thing.

The artist was honoring the ocean. Illuminating Laguna’s creativity. Showing how unsullied the ocean really is, away from electricity and industry.

Instead, the legacy of the banned ocean streetlight will rest solely on the California Coastal Commission, a bully with just enough power to ruin it for everyone.

DAVID HANSEN is a writer and Laguna Beach resident. He can be reached at hansen.dave@gmail.com.

UPDATES:

10:33 a.m., Nov. 10. This column was updated to include responses from a Coastal Commission spokeswoman. The spokeswoman explained that the commission and the Department of Fish & Wildlife did not approve the Laguna project and that the commission does not regulate water quality or litter removal but nevertheless organizes beach cleanups.