Review: Undercooked ‘Asian Connection’ lacks spice

Even by diminished B-movie standards — and the name Steven Seagal above the title — “Asian Connection,” about a pair of American bank robbers who set up shop in Southeast Asia, is a dumb, boring dud.

Though the promotional material might suggest otherwise, the big guy isn’t among the perpetrators.

Those would be the lesser-known John Edward Lee and Byron Gibson, who run into a bit of trouble when they knock off a bank belonging to a ruthless — as opposed to, say, happy-go-lucky — drug lord, played by Seagal.

After an unplanned turn of events puts his partner out of the picture, Lee’s Jack teams with his pretty girlfriend, Avalon (Pim Bubear), who also occasionally pitches in as the narrator. But those anticipating “Bonnie and Clyde”-style fireworks will be out of luck.

So will Seagal fans expecting more than what amounts to a handful of extended cameos in which he eerily bears more than a passing resemblance to David Crosby. Same story for those who may have been drawn by second-billed Michael Jai White, who appears in even fewer scenes.

Generically directed by Daniel Zirilli, who shares story credit with Tom Sizemore, the listless “Asian Connection” may be set in Bangkok and Cambodia but it feels about exotic as an order of take-out Thai.

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‘Asian Connection’

MPAA rating: R for violence, language throughout and brief sexuality/nudity

Running time: 1 hour, 30 minutes

Playing: Arena Cinema, Hollywood