Opinion: Ax the acronyms

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USA PATRIOT Act is actually an acronym for the (let’s all groan at once) Uniting and Strengthening America by Providing Appropriate Tools Required to Intercept and Obstruct Terrorism Act of 2001. But that post-9/11 law was neither the beginning nor the end of the congressional practice of affixing cutesy and tendentious titles to legislation.

The temporary “fix” Congress approved this summer in the Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act — the fix the Bush administration wants to make permanent — is called the Protect America Act of 2007. Mercifully, it is not an acronym, perhaps to avoid confusion with the PROTECT Act of 2003, an anti-child-abuse measure that stands for Prosecutorial Remedies and Other Tools to end the Exploitation of Children Today.

But the acronym gambit figures in new, more privacy-friendly FISA legislation being pushed by Democrats. Today the House Judiciary Committee marked up — wait for it — the The Responsible Electronic Surveillance [T]hat is Overseen, Reviewed, and Effective Act of 2007. Get it? The RESTORE Act, as in restoring civil liberties snatched away by the Protect America Act.

It’s time for a moratorium on titles like these. If Congress establishes the proper balance between national security and privacy, I’m happy to have the bill called The Foreign Intelligence Act Amendments of 2007. But I have a feeling that the acronymizers won’t stop until forced to by legislation. How about the Seriously Targeting, Opposing and Preventing Inane Titles Act of 2007 — the STOP IT act!