Charlie Sheen to ‘Two and a Half Men’s’ Chuck Lorre: ‘Where ya hiding, silly clown?’

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Perhaps the most epic revelation to come out of the Charlie Sheen brouhaha is this: The guy has an extraordinary sense of smell. No, really. Blame it on the tiger blood, if you wish, but he has declared that the “carnage” that “Two and a Half Men” co-creator Chuck Lorre “created” smells like malaria. And that, dear readers, is winning. Or, perhaps, just another sad glimpse of a troubled actor as he publicly unravels.

Sheen continued his media saturation Tuesday night on his Ustream show, ‘Sheen’s Korner,’ to address his termination from “Two and a Half Men.” It was the fourth installment for the actor.


Those who tuned in -- and the number counter kept ticking on the screen -- were first greeted with close-up shots of the book cover for “The Art of War: Great Commanders of the Ancient and Medieval World 1600 BC-AD 1600' (sure to be a higher honor than being selected for Oprah’s book club) and shots of the so-called tiger blood.

And then Sheen unleashed an incoherent rant clocking in at around eight minutes.

“Good evening,” he began, “What occurred yesterday was completely and entirely illegal. Unconscionable. And to quote my lawyer really ... suck suck.”

The move to fire Sheen came after several weeks of public battling between the actor and CBS, Warner Bros. and Lorre.

The embattled actor went on to list guests he’d like to appear on “Sheen’s Korner.” At No. 4 was “Chuck-E-Cheese ball,’ by which one can only assume he means Lorre. What followed was this:

“Where ya hiding, silly clown? Behind your narcissism, your greed, your hatred of yourself or women? …
Think of me often, loser, during your most quiet moments. All alone in the world, staring into the mirror, your least favorite activity. Think of me as you pray to the silly God of AA. …

Can you smell your soul? Can you smell the rotting dog ... ? The fermented puke that is your viscera? Can you smell the lies? Can you smell the carnage you created? Can you smell the imposter living within? Can you smell your mother’s tears from some distant memory as she scattered her pathetic creation asking all around her why this feeble abortion survived? Can you smell it, Chuck? It smells like malaria in case you were wondering.”

ShowTrackers, did you tune-in? What did you think of Sheen’s tirade?

-- Yvonne Villarreal


Complete Charlie Sheen coverage on ShowTracker