‘America’s Got Talent’ results: America’s got taste!

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Turns out ‘America’s Got Talent’ watchers don’t have such bad taste after all. On the first results episode of the season Wednesday night, we learned that ‘AGT’ voters had put through three of the best acts: the mesmerizing, electrifying street dancer Snap Boogie; the death-defying, envelope-pushing Sandou Trio Russian Bar; and the adorable 11-year-old singer Anna Graceman.

And sad as I was to see the Fearless Flores Family ride their motorcycles off into the sunset rather than back into the Globe of Death, the fourth and final act to make it through Wednesday night (thanks in part to the judges) made up for it: the Miami All-Stars precision dance troupe, another favorite.

Four solid semifinal picks, America.

But what the show offered in satisfaction, it lacked in suspense. Note to ‘AGT’ producers: When you’re nearly certain you know what the results will be -- did anyone really think suddenly cheesy Dezmond Meeks or talking parrot Echo would knock that cutie Graceman out of the running? -- a long dramatic pause just feels like a waste of time.

In fairness, I suppose there was only so much the producers could have done, given the acts’ performances Tuesday night. First to the stage were the Fearless Flores Family, Duo Aero and Snap Boogie. After dissing Duo Aero, Piers Morgan declined to say which of the remaining two he preferred, but when Snap Boogie was chosen to move on to the next round, Sharon Osbourne gushed that she was ‘overjoyed’ and had goosebumps and a heart that was going pitter-pat.

Then after a little chat time with Cedric the Entertainer, who’s promoting a new TV show, and a performance by Avril Lavigne, who’s promoting a recent album, three more acts -- genre-less Squonk Opera, acrobats Sandou Trio Russian Bar and singing comedian J. Chris Newberg -- were gathered to learn their fates. Morgan was not alone in hailing the fact that amidst the ‘weirdos from hell’ and ‘the world’s least funny comedian,’ the ‘dramatic’ and ‘breathtaking’ acrobatic troupe was the act that made it through.

And after Graceman triumphed over Meeks and Echo, thanked the audience for voting for her (‘I love you all and I feel so special right now. Thank you so much,’ she said, dimples a-twinkle) and was told by Howie Mandel that she was emerging as one of the season’s biggest stars, any remaining tension seeped out during an altogether unexciting performance by the cast of the Broadway musical ‘Priscilla Queen of the Desert.’ (I kept waiting for Morgan to buzz them!)


Honestly, by the time the last group of acts -- Those Funny Little People, the Fiddleheads, Miami All-Stars -- was called to the stage, even host Nick Cannon looked like he’d had about enough. No surprise that the oversized dancing stuffed toys were sent home, pleasing Piers Morgan and those of us who were growing mighty weary of the Piers-hates-Those-Funny-Little-People storyline.

The judges had the honor of choosing which of the remaining two acts, which had come in fourth and fifth in the voting, would make it through to the semifinals. Would it be the dancers who performed perfectly despite a music setback or the talented musicians who completely botched their song choice (and as a result, their performance) Tuesday night? Tough call? Hmmm. Not so much. Osbourne and Morgan and perhaps everyone save the Fiddleheads’ mothers probably agreed that the Miami All-Stars, who promised to showcase different types of dancing in the future, were more deserving.

And so we have our first four semifinalists of the season -- talented all. Well done, America.

Bring on the dancing cupcakes! (On second thought, maybe not.)


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-- Amy Reiter