Opinion: News shocker! Aliens seek to communicate with Kucinich

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According to an alleged British celebrity website, ‘veteran actress Shirley MacLaine has called on the U.S. government to make its files on Unidentified Flying Objects (U.F.O.s) public.’

According to the report today, MacLaine was delighted when ‘her close friend’ Dennis Kucinich ‘revealed he believes in alien spacecraft in a recent interview. And the 73-year-old hopes his confession will prompt lawmakers to follow the lead of other countries by opening their U.F.O. files.’


‘I thought that was terrific,’ the site quotes the actress as saying, ‘that a presidential candidate admitted it. It’s time. Many countries have released their files -- Argentina has, Brazil, France. Let’s do it.’

Actually, Kucinich was asked about his alleged UFO sighting during last week’s Democratic debate in Philadelphia. And he didn’t say he believed in creatures from another world.

According to the transcript, moderator Tim Russert asked: ‘Congressman Kucinich, I want to move to a different area, because this is a serious question. The godmother of your daughter, Shirley MacLaine, writes in her new book that you sighted a UFO over her home in Washington state ... [laughter] ... that you found the encounter extremely moving, that it was a ‘triangular craft, silent and hovering,’ that you ‘felt a connection to your heart and heard directions in your mind.’

Now, did you see a UFO?’

The Cleveland congressman took a deep breath and replied: ‘I did. And the rest of the account -- I didn’t -- it was an unidentified flying object, OK? It’s, like, it’s unidentified. I saw something. Now, to answer your question, I’m moving my -- it’s -- and I’m also going to move my campaign office to Roswell, New Mexico, and other one in Exeter, New Hampshire, OK? And also, you have to keep in mind that more -- that Jimmy Carter saw a UFO and also that more people in this country have seen UFOs than I think approve of George Bush’s presidency.’

It can be revealed here exclusively now that that Web account was, in fact, not written by Britons but by space aliens who have taken over that website and seek to spread belief in outer space creatures among earthlings. The way you can tell is that their story identifies Kucinich as a ‘Republican presidential candidate.’

-- Andrew Malcolm