A Get Well Wish of Sorts for Ara

You have to think Ara Parseghian was kidding, but maybe not.

Recalling the 1974 USC-Notre Dame game when the Irish blew a 24-0 lead and lost, 55-24, Ara told David Casstevens of the Dallas Morning News he later checked into a hospital for a few days of rest.

After a couple of days, he said he received the following telegram:

“Dear Coach: The Athletic Board of the University of Notre Dame wishes you a very speedy recovery, by a vote margin of four to three.”

Said Washington Coach Don James in Miami after it was announced that BYU had been voted No. 1: “My biggest disappointment of all comes from the writers who voted for Florida. In the UPI poll, the coaches agree not to vote for a team on probation. I don’t think you should vote for a team that got where they are with an absolute violation of the rules. If you gave me a suitcase full of money, I could go out and buy a pretty good football team, too.”

Cracked a reporter later: “If somebody meets James in Seattle with a suitcase, we could have a hell of a story.”

Add James: Asked about next season’s scheduled game with BYU, he said: “I think we’re going to work a lot on pass defense.”

If it’s any comfort to Doug Flutie, another pretty good quarterback closed out his college career with less than dazzling statistics in the Cotton Bowl.

In Pittsburgh’s 7-3 loss to SMU in 1983, the Pitt quarterback completed 19 of 37 passes for 181 yards with one interception. His name was Dan Marino.

Ugh Dept.: From Rich Tosches of UPI: “Why don’t Big Ten football teams eat cereal for breakfast? Because they keep losing their bowls.”

In 1978, Steve Fuller quarterbacked Clemson to an 11-1 record, using Jerry Butler as his favorite receiver.

Says Dwight Clark, another Clemson receiver who caught only 11 passes that season: “I was living with Steve in a big house my senior year when Bill Walsh came down to take a look at him. Steve asked me to come down to the field to catch a few passes so Walsh could take a look at him. It was just one of those days when I could catch everything. Everything stuck to my hands.”

The 49ers never got a shot at Fuller or Butler, having traded their No. 1 pick for O.J. Simpson. They got Clark in the 10th round. Not a bad deal.

Anyway, the old Tigers will be adversaries Sunday when Fuller goes to Candlestick with the Chicago Bears.

Add Bears: Says defensive end Richard Dent, setting his sights on Joe Montana, after putting the hurt on another former Notre Dame quarterback last Sunday: “We’ll find out how much courage he has. Joe Theismann showed a lot of courage. He stood in there and took his licks.”

Dallas Mavericks center Kurt Nimphius, who played one season in Italy, says of Joe Barry Carroll’s decision to play there: “He won’t like it. That’s a big culture shock to go over there like that, especially for a black person. It’s a big adjustment. It’s not like America. Guys who’ve been over in Europe and have traveled around love to come back to America.”

Quotebook

Chicago Coach Mike Ditka, scoffing at the betting line, which favors San Francisco by 9 1/2 points Sunday: “Even the German army couldn’t beat us with 9 1/2 points.”