He Dialed for Help and Lost

The Tampa Bay Buccaneers were in the process of losing their third straight game Sept. 22 at New Orleans, but columnist Larry Guest of the Orlando Sentinel hadn’t yet given up.

“There was a momentary flash of

hope,” he wrote. “The Superdome scoreboard flashed this message: ‘For any problems, call 524-HELP.’ I dialed and reached an answering service operator who said she would transfer me to the proper agency depending on the nature of the problem. I said I was calling on behalf of Tampa Bay Coach Leeman Bennett for any plays that would work against the Saints. I told her time was of the essence.

“She put me on hold. Thirty seconds later, another lady came on the line and asked me to repeat the problem. When I did, she said that information was not available and hung up.

“It was that kind of hopeless day for the Bucs.”

The Saints won, 20-13.

Trivia Time: Bob Cain, former left-handed pitcher for the Detroit Tigers, is the answer to what trivia question? (Answer below.)

The subject was the 11 straight wins by Byron Nelson in 1945, and Lee Trevino was asked if anyone could duplicate the streak today.

“Eleven in a row?” he said. “Why, nobody can even win four in a year , let alone in a row. Never mind 11 in a row. You can’t win 11 in a year if you played all over the world and counted the Uganda and Beirut Opens.”

Said a Times staffer after reading a story on the possibility of George Brett breaking Pete Rose’s record: “There’s one little problem. Rose isn’t through yet. Who knows how many hits he’ll get before he quits?”

True. He’s still good enough to rank fifth in the National League in on-base percentage. Also, he’s the manager. Who’s going to keep him out of the lineup?

Concorde Pictures announces that Kansas City pitcher Bret Saberhagen will appear in the upcoming movie “KILL-BOTS,” a science-fiction film that director Jim Wynorski will begin shooting Oct. 23.

Note to Mr. Wynorski: If the Royals make it to the World Series, don’t look for Mr. Saberhagen on the set the first day. The Series is scheduled to open Oct. 19. It could run until Oct. 27.

Pam Shriver, on Hungarian tennis star Andrea Temesvari, a favorite of the male fans: “She spends more time putting on makeup than the rest of the girls combined. Her wrap-around skirts barely cover her tennis pants, which barely cover what should be covered.”

Trivia Answer: On Aug. 19, 1951 at St. Louis, Cain walked pinch-hitter Eddie Gaedel of the Browns on four pitches. Gaedel was the midget hired by St. Louis owner Bill Veeck as a promotional stunt.

Add Gaedel: He surfaced 10 years later when Veeck owned the Chicago White Sox. Veeck, taking note of the fans’ constant complaints about vendors blocking their view, hired Gaedel and seven other midgets to work the box seats at Comiskey Park on opening day of 1961.

Adds The Sporting News: “As another first-game highlight, Veeck asked John F. Kennedy to throw out the first ball in 1961. And Kennedy did. One not-so-small point, though. This JFK was a fan from suburban Oak Lawn, not the President of the United States.”

Quotebook

Raider quarterback Rusty Hilger, asked what his teammates said to him when he took over from the injured Marc Wilson last Sunday: “They said, ‘Don’t screw it up.’ ”