THE TOP ALBUMS: ASSESSING THE REAL POP WORLD

OK, “Sun City,” the Replacements, R.E.M., Talking Heads and Tom Waits were the big pop deals of 1985, critically speaking. But what about the real world?

None of those five albums--which composed the Top 5 in the year-end poll of The Times’ pop music writers--came close to the top of Billboard magazine’s weekly sales charts during the past 12 months.

Only three of the LPs even cracked the Top 30 during the year. Waits’ “Rain Dogs” peaked at No. 181, while the Replacements’ “Tim” has yet to make the list of 200 best sellers at all.

So, what about the albums that people are buying--the ones that are on the real (commercial) Top 10? Where would they fit on a critic’s list?

To answer that question, I listened again to each of the albums in the Billboard Top 10 for the week of Jan. 18 to see where I would rank them artistically on a list of the best 100 albums of 1985. I soon discovered that 100 was far too kind a figure.

Some of this week’s best sellers are so dreary that you’d be hard pressed finding a place for them on a list of the year’s 200 best albums.

In drafting a personal list of the 100 best albums of 1985, I applied all the concepts that critics talk about when measuring excellence: originality, passion, purpose, heart, special vision, energy, excitement, freshness, challenge and craft.

For the current best sellers that didn’t earn a spot in the Top 100, I projected how far I’d have to extend the list to reach the level of their dubious achievement. The worst of the records today are the epitome of hollow commercial accommodation. They are simply recycled riffs presented in slick, agreeable packages that are tailor-made for pop/rock radio and ask nothing more of its audience than dollars.

The best music invites the listener to become an active participant by stimulating--or in the peak occasions inspiring-- you to feel strongly about something or to think about something in a fresh way. The weaker the music, the less the challenge involved. It’s music that takes no chances and sheds no light.

The ultimate test is history. It’s easy to look back and see which artists shaped pop music and touched us most deeply: the Sinatras and Presleys, Beatles and Stones, Dylans and Wonders. The harder part is seeing which of today’s artists or, in today’s case, albums will influence the way we think about music and about ourselves.

So, how do last week’s best sellers rank on the 1985 list?

For perspective, here again is my list of the year’s 10 best albums released in the United States, in order: Artists United Against Apartheid’s “Sun City,” John Fogerty’s “Centerfield,” Lone Justice’s “Lone Justice,” the Replacements’ “Tim,” R.E.M.’s “Fables of the Reconstruction,” the Blasters’ “Hard Line,” 10,000 Maniacs’ “The Wishing Chair,” Sting’s “The Dream of the Blue Turtles,” Aretha Franklin’s “Who’s Zoomin’ Who” and Kate Bush’s “Hounds of Love.”

(Some of the albums in my Top 10 did make the Billboard Top 10 sales list during 1985; Fogerty reached No. 1, Sting made it to No. 2.)

Extending the list to 20, in order: the Meat Puppets’ “Up on the Sun,” Tom Waits’ “Rain Dogs,” Husker Du’s “Flip Your Wig,” Bob Dylan’s “Empire Burlesque,” Eurythmics’ “Be Yourself Tonight,” the “Go-Go Crankin’ ” collection, Bob Dylan’s “Empire Burlesque,” Prince’s “Around the World in a Day,” Tom Petty’s “Southern Accents,” Run-D.M.C.’s “King of Rock,” and John Prine’s “Aimless Love.”

We still haven’t touched on a record in the current Top 10. So, proceeding in our Top 100, I’d put Don Henley’s “Building the Perfect Beast,” the Knitters’ “Poor Little Critter in the Road,” Ry Cooder’s “Alamo Bay” sound track, the Cure’s “Head on the Door,” Richard Thompson’s “Across a Crowded Room,” Stevie Wonder’s “In Square Circle.” . . .

“ In Square Circle “?

We’ve finally hit an album in this week’s best-seller Top 10. The following albums are on the current Billboard chart list and rated here by where they’d fit in a list of the best albums of 1985. (This week’s No. 8 album--Bruce Springsteen’s “Born in the U.S.A.”--was released in 1984, so I’ve included No. 11--Tears for Fears’ “Songs From the Big Chair”--in my Top 10.)

No. 26--Stevie Wonder’s “In Square Circle” (Tamla). No doubt about it: If a newcomer came even close to an album as varied and smoothly assured as this, he’d be hailed as the pop find of the year. Despite such highlights as the introspective “Whereabouts” and punchier “Go Home,” however, the album is a disappointment because you can’t shake the lingering feeling that Wonder isn’t applying himself fully. There is too safe and predictable a tone to the material and execution.

No. 47--Dire Straits’ “Brothers in Arms” (Warner Bros.). Parts of the LP are so blandly designed that they all but disappear if you concentrate on them (the aptly titled “So Far Away”), while others hook you with catchy riffs and images (“Walk of Life,” “Money for Nothing”) just when you aren’t really paying attention. The combination of smooth guitarmanship and gently nostalgic currents has made it an ideal package for a mass audience--and for Grammy voters (the LP has picked up several nominations). But there’s far more nuance and personal statement in Mark Knopfler’s solo, sound-track efforts.

No. 50--John Cougar Mellencamp’s “Scarecrow” (Riva). While the debate isn’t entirely academic over whether Mellencamp’s new concerned-citizen and good-guy attitude is a sign of greater vision or simple opportunism (the commercial timing is right), he is making far better music than the old, wasteland fodder of “Jack and Diane.” He’s addressing legitimate themes: the national character and the American heartland. Still, he is coming to the inspirational, follow-your-dreams and understand-your-roots territory of Springsteen, Seger and Petty too late for the songs to carry the same impact.

No. 61 to 70--Barbra Streisand’s “The Broadway Album” (Columbia). Let’s say it again: Streisand is quite possibly the most gifted female singer of her generation, and she made a spectacular pop entry with larger-than-life renditions of songs like “People.” Since then, however, she has tended to waste her voice on material that was hopelessly middlebrow or totally inappropriate (her misreading of David Bowie’s “Life on Mars” remains a cult comedy classic). The good news here is that she returns to her roots, so to speak, though she does it in a self-conscious and self-congratulatory manner. The album opens with voices warning her that an album of Broadway material is such a dangerous move: “Nobody in Middle America (will buy it)” . . . “It’s not commercial” . . . “You’ve got to appeal to the kids.” Who’s kidding whom? What could be more commercial than Streisand hooking up with songs by Sondheim, the Gershwins and Rodgers & Hammerstein? Linda Ronstadt was the one who took the real chance with “What’s New,” her salute to pop standards of the past. In this LP, Streisand glides gracefully and effectively through some of the tunes and surprises you with a high-tech treatment of “Somewhere.” Overall, however, there is a conservatism that severely limits your ability to work up much passion for the album.

No. 71 to 80--ZZ Top’s “Afterburner” (Warner Bros.). The bearded boys’ joke is running thin in their videos, but they’re showing considerable ambition and spunk in trying to keep their winning streak going by adapting synthesizer and other contemporary pop-rock hit-making devices. But does half the album have to sound like an audition tape for “Miami Vice”?

No. 91 to 100--Sade’s “Promise” (Portrait). The big debate over Sade is whether the music is a breakthrough (toward a cooly sophisticated form of urban pop-jazz) or a bore. Her debut album last spring suggested a stylish, if very understated, independent vision that could be quite appealing if expanded. This follow-up doesn’t demonstrate much follow-through. She’s still someone worth watching, though the pulse rate is v-e-r-y slow. I prefer music that wakes you up--not music that lulls you to sleep.

No. 103--”Miami Vice,” various artists (MCA). If Don Johnson can make the cover of Rolling Stone magazine four times in nine months, why should we be surprised to see this TV sound track sell 3 million copies and spend 11 weeks (and counting) at No. 1? There’s a lesson here, but it’s for merchandising classes, not music courses. Some of the numbers (Jan Hammer’s title theme and Glenn Frey’s “Smuggler’s Blues”) capture the anxious, danger-and-temptation-around-every-corner sensibilities of the show, but the rap is silly and some of Hammer’s other instrumentals are as flat as their titles: “Flashback” and “Evan.” Between the extremes, there are some old tracks that sounded better the first time around: Phil Collins’ “In the Air Tonight” and Tina Turner’s “Better Be Good to Me.” (OK, there is a catch to why Johnson was on Rolling Stone’s cover four times. The first two covers were reprinted on the year-end cover).

No. 107--Tears for Fears’ “Songs From the Big Chair” (Mercury). One point of view is that there is purpose behind what sounds to me like a lot of commercially minded, vacuous synth-pop. That view maintains that Roland Orzabal and Curt Smith--the main Tears forFear--are just using the synth-pop textures to hook trendy young rock fans in order to get them to think about some of the serious issues of the day--such as the greedy social instincts outlined in “Everybody Wants to Rule the World.” Another point of view is that the social issues are just a clever way to hide the fact these commercially minded guys are making vacuous synth-pop.

No. 141--Starship’s “Knee Deep in the Hoopla” (Grunt/RCA). There’s something disheartening and distasteful about a veteran group’s ability to figure out exactly what will appeal to radio programmers and then delivering it so willingly. This wasn’t the rock ‘n’ roll that built that city.

No. 158--Heart’s “Heart” (Capitol). How ironic that a band chooses for its name the very quality that its music lacks. Everything on the album sounds like the glossy but soulless music that salesmen play for you in high-tech audio showrooms.

And yes, the list does go on.