If Smith Is Angry, How Does Billy Feel?

Amid the controversy surrounding the suspension of Rich (Goose) Gossage by the San Diego Padres for his criticism of Ballard Smith, everyone overlooked what Gossage had to say about Billy Martin, his former manager with the New York Yankees.

“Did you see they retired No. 1 for Billy?” Gossage said. “Is George (Steinbrenner) kidding? You’re talking Babe Ruth, Lou Gehrig, Joe D, Mickey Mantle . . . Thurman (Munson). And they retire the little bleeper’s number?

“We’re talking tradition and all that. Some of the all-time great players, and they retire his number? I mean, you could even make a case for not retiring Thurman’s number. If he played five more years, there wouldn’t be any question. But he was the captain, and the way it happened . . . they did the right thing.

“But Billy? That’s ridiculous.”

When you hear some of the stories, it’s no wonder the Southwest Conference is in a mess over illegal recruiting tactics.

Rich Olson, a former assistant coach at SMU and Arkansas, tells this one about recruiting a highly rated Texas prep star: “He said he had a vacant lot and he wanted a house built on it. I laughed. I said, ‘You got to be kidding.’ ”

He wasn’t.

That may be one reason Olson is now an assistant at Fresno State.

Add SWC: SMU and Texas Christian have been placed on probation by the NCAA, and four other schools--including defending champion and 1986 favorite Texas A&M--are; being investigated.

Said a Texas high school coach who has a number of former players caught up in the recruiting problems: “It looks like they’ll have to declare amnesty to have a team in the Cotton Bowl.”

Manager Bobby Valentine of the Texas Rangers was bothered by some careless base running Saturday night, but the Rangers hit three home runs to beat the Chicago White Sox, 6-2.

“The home runs sure were nice,” Valentine said. “You can’t make any base-running mistakes when you hit it over the fence.”

On Friday, Gary Wichard, agent for cornerback Jerry Holmes, called the New York York Jets’ contract offer to his client a “slap in the face.”

Holmes must have said: “Thanks, I needed that.”

On Saturday, he signed the contract.

Reliever Lee Smith of the Chicago Cubs bought a satellite dish so his parents could watch the games on television. Now he wonders if it was a mistake.

“I really enjoy watching the Dodgers,” his father said.

Added Mrs. Smith: “Every time I see you pitch, your ERA goes up.”

Quotebook

Joaquin Andujar of the Oakland A’s after beating the Baltimore Orioles, 7-0, Sunday: “I feel good because I didn’t allow any boom-booms.”