This Tony Llama’s Boots Are Made for Running

It won’t rival Super Tuesday, but Ramona is having its biannual election for honorary mayor. One candidate is definitely no wimp. He’s a llama--the beast, not the priest.

Meet Tony Lama Llama, a 6-foot-tall, white-haired fellow with black markings around his eyes and snout. In 1984, he ran sixth out of 12 candidates. Tony is owned by John Mallon and his wife, Kathleen McLeod, who raise, breed and train llamas.

“The day we announced Tony’s candidacy, Alexander Haig quit the presidential race, so we figure Tony has some sort of power over other candidates,” McLeod said. “He’s outstanding in his field.”

The for-fun campaign is meant as a fund-raiser for civic improvements. The candidate who garners the most $1 votes before June 25 wins.

What kind of mayor would Tony make?

“A good one,” McLeod said. “He’s quiet and has large ears for listening. He’s very clean. He doesn’t smoke, but he does chew. That must be the country boy in him coming out.”

Chewing could present the hoofed pol with a conflict of interest. A hot topic in Ramona is whether to cut down a row of 100-year-old eucalyptus trees to widen a major road. Tony Lama Llama is fond of nibbling eucalyptus.

“Tony will have an official position on the eucalyptus issue when he formally announces March 6,” McLeod said.

A De-tour, Dahling

Zsa Zsa Gabor was a no-show Sunday for a VIP tour of the San Diego Zoo arranged by Mayor Maureen O’Connor.

Zsa Zsa had met the mayor Saturday night at the centennial bash at the Hotel del Coronado. Along with collecting husbands and diamonds, Zsa Zsa’s interests include the preservation of wild animals. A tour of the zoo was quickly arranged.

Zoo officials, keen on the value of celebrity support, have given similar tours to Sophia Loren and Gina Lollobrigida. But, for reasons as mysterious as her exact birth date, the Hungarian-born Gabor never appeared, leaving the zoo’s director of operations and a specially arranged tour guide waiting.

“Oh well,” said zoo spokesman Jeff Jouett, “at least we can all say we were stood up by Zsa Zsa Gabor. How many men can say that?”

Snob Snobbery

Escondido Mayor Jim Rady is threatening to boycott the black-tie fete planned for March 18 to celebrate the opening of the new $15.7-million civic center. He doesn’t like the highbrow tone and the $60 ticket price.

“Escondido is not a black-tie community,” he fumed.

The mayor’s wife, June, does plan to attend the so-called “Party of the Century,” saying: “I thought Jim should have raised his objections earlier.”

Camp Marilyn

Everyone knows that Marilyn Monroe came to the Hotel del Coronado to film “Some Like It Hot.” Now a Canadian woman writing an exhaustive biography of Monroe has unearthed an earlier visit to San Diego County.

Sandra Peace, who lives in Ontario and makes a living repossessing Visa cards, spends her off-hours researching Monroe “from a fan’s point of view,” determined to know her whereabouts every single day of her life.

One day that particularly intrigues Peace is March 30, 1952, when Monroe was part of a Hollywood show for Korea-bound Marines at Camp Pendleton. After placing pleas for help in various Marine newspapers, Peace has begun to put together a picture of that chilly evening at Tent Camp II.

Fresh from her success in “All About Eve” and “Asphalt Jungle,” Monroe was the headliner in a bill that included such show-business immortals as violinist Saundra Berkova, pianist Marvin Mozel, and the comedy team of Wallace & Carroll.

Monroe wore a tight-fitting, plum-colored evening gown, low-cut and held up by spaghetti straps. She had been drinking. She sang three off-key songs and the Marines loved it.

“Marilyn was terrified of performing and she had almost no singing voice at all,” said Peace, who has collected several tapes of Monroe singing. “I talked to one Marine who was 20 rows back. He said he had never seen someone as beautiful.”

Seventy-six books have been written about Monroe, but Peace wants hers to be the most complete. After four years’ labor, she figures she’s half-finished.

Looking Backward

Former City Councilman Bill Mitchell is conducting seminars on the metaphysical aspects of spontaneous recall, meditation and success motivation. Also, past-life regressions, channeling and “Moving to Success Without Efforting.”

Seminars are scheduled for Saturday at Marina Village in San Diego and March 5 at the North County Church of Religious Science in Encinitas: $39 per person in advance, $44 at the door.

“I have practiced past-life regressions since 1958,” Mitchell said.

A defeat in the 1985 election allowed him to regress back to being a real estate broker and private citizen.