Talk About a Long Day at Office

In 1987, it took Ivan Lendl and Mats Wilander 4 hours 47 minutes to complete their championship match in the U.S. Open. This year, it took 4:54.

According to Thomas Boswell of the Washington Post, it took Steffi Graf only 4:57 combined to win all four of her Grand Slam finals this year.

Boswell: “If opera and symphony, film and theater, baseball and football, weddings and funerals, and even presidential inaugurations, must explain themselves when they pass the three-hour mark, then how do two guys from Greenwich, Conn.--by way of Ostrava, Czechoslovakia, and Vaxjo, Sweden--get to play a doubleheader on network TV?

“Tennis needs a new rule. When Lendl and Wilander meet in the U.S. Open, they should have to play the first two sets back in the hotel lobby.”

For What It’s Worth: Two weeks into the college football season, the Pacific 10 is 11-0 in nonconference games, while the Big Ten is 3-9. Iowa and Michigan both were picked by national magazines to win the national championship. Each lost its opener.

Add Big Ten: Said Wisconsin Coach Don Morton of Saturday’s game with Northern Illinois: “It’s a very important game.”

Don’t laugh. Wisconsin lost its opener to Western Michigan.

Morton: “It would be a key game for us if we were playing Boy Scout Troop 180.”

Think he’ll have any one-liners next week? The Badgers travel to Miami.

The subject was security, and United States rower John Strotbeck told Bill Glauber of the Baltimore Sun at the Olympic village in Seoul: “They gave us a list of 10 rules to follow if we’re taken hostage. It included everything from not being arrogant to maintaining a level of sanitation. We got a short language lesson in Korean and saw a film about South Korea’s security forces. They were running down the side of buildings, going into windows and shooting the hell out of grapefruits and watermelons.

“We’re not too worried,” he added. “We have the American shooting team across from us. They’re up high, just in case someone is up on the roof.”

Trivia Time: What player hit 35 home runs in his 16th and final season in the majors? (Answer to follow.)

The-beat-goes-on Department: Greg Bell of the Rams, with 139 yards, had the best rushing total in the NFL Sunday. If he holds on to his starting job, he could become the club’s third rushing champion in three years.

Eric Dickerson won the title in 1986 and Charles White in 1987.

So it goes under John Robinson, who has almost cornered the market. At USC, White and Marcus Allen won NCAA rushing titles, with Allen setting a record of 2,342 yards. Dickerson, in his second year with the Rams, set the NFL record of 2,105.

Would-you-believe-it Department: On this date in 1883, Hugh Daily, a one-armed pitcher for Cleveland, beat Philadelphia with a no-hitter, 1-0.

Trivia Answer: Dave Kingman of the Oakland A’s in 1986.

Quotebook

Louisville football Coach Howard Schnellenberger, looking positively to Saturday’s game against Memphis State after losses of 27-16 to Maryland and 44-9 to Wyoming: “I’m an expert at looking into dim situations and finding a silver lining.”