A Mothers’ Day for Peace for Entire Family of Man

“Arise, then, women of this day! Arise, all women who have hearts. . . . Say firmly, ‘We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies.’ ” So said Julia Ward Howe in 1870. So says Susan Clark today.

The day has been designated as Mothers’ Day for Peace by Clark and her flourishing cohort: 6 million in 1986, 9 million in ‘87, 13 million last year, and counting. And as in Howe’s case, “irrelevant agencies” were the goad.

“When I was in ‘Webster,’ ” actress Clark says, “we had a lot of interviews with the press, and I was constantly asked the same two questions: ‘What is it like to work with your husband (Alex Karras, also her spouse in the show)?’ and ‘How tall is Emmanuel Lewis (elfin protagonist)?’ I asked my publicist, ‘Why can’t we talk about something important, something like: What are we doing building more and more weapons? I’m scared to death, and there are millions just as frightened as I am.’ ”

A friend advised Clark, “Don’t come on like gangbusters. Stay away from politics. Make a personal appeal, maybe something that would work with Mother’s Day.” Clark agreed, wondering, “What could everyone who celebrates the day do, regardless of gender or income? Well, we could all wear a flower. . . .”

A “simple, grass-roots idea that started from zip” in 1985 has spawned observances in 40 U.S. cities, five countries, 70 organizations, all abetted by Clark’s unique TV “Satellite Tour” in which she is “present” to advise local groups, to cajole, to inspire.

With a disarming blend of wit, charm, pluck and perseverance, Clark spins off Howe’s “great questions” (“Why do we give birth to boys only for them to go off and kill each other?”) with her own updates:

“What are we (humans) doing?” she asks. “Why are we poisoning Mother Earth? Why are 25% of our children living below the poverty line? What do we do with toxic waste; where the hell do we put the plutonium? Why are 80% of the homeless women and children?”

Let mothers, not “irrelevant agencies,” take the lead, Clark suggests. Let the tough questions be addressed. “There are days when I get down,” she confesses, “but then Holland wants to come aboard (the movement), and Britain; some of the Asian nations express interest. And I think, ‘Yes, we can turn this world around.’ ”

Arise, then, women of this day!

All Shook Up Over a Quake Detector

Necessity is not the only mother of invention. Would you believe panic?

“I was born in L.A.,” Kimberly Everett of Park La Brea says, “so I’ve been terrified of earthquakes all my life. Call me ‘Jell-O Legs.’

“I’m a single mother of a 3-year-old boy, and when the October quake hit I was at work. I was worried about him, wondering whether it shook as much at home as it did here (CBS, where Everett is a videotape technician/editor). No way to tell, really, so I invented the ‘Ligneous Indicant.’ ”

Now on sale everywhere from Euphoria Records in Malibu to the Griffith Park Observatory, Everett’s low-tech, high-risibilty “Earthquake Detector” is the very pith of simplicity. Ligneous derives from the Latin for wood, and the nitty of the indicant is a toothpick. “You get some soil or sand from under--or at least near--the structure where you’re going to set up,” Everett says. “Put it in the clear plastic container I provide and make sure the ligneous indicant is standing straight up.

“In a temblor, it’ll move left or right, north or south, or even sink, and you can tell how violent the quake was. If the whole thing tips over, you’ve kind of had it.”

It’s not Everett’s first invention, nor, one hopes, the last. “My son has a calcium deficiency but hates to brush his teeth,” she says, “so I’ve invented a toothbrush that actually makes kids want to brush--a great idea that I don’t want to leak. It would take capital, though, so I invent stuff easier to market. A fur bikini didn’t work--don’t ask--but the indicant is doing fine.”

Antic instructions are included, in three languages including Japanese. “I’m really into balancing the trade deficit,” Everett says. “I eat sushi and I drive a Honda and I feel bad about it, so I want to repatriate some dollars. Besides, where can they get something that’ll last a lifetime without batteries? Actually, it’s not low -tech. It’s no -tech.”