You may recall the stories of parents...

You may recall the stories of parents discovering to their horror that their children had fallen prey to advertisements for 976-prefix, dial-a-porn numbers and had run up hundreds of dollars in telephone bills.

Now City Hall is having the same problem.

An internal audit has revealed that city phones may have rung up as much as $8,000 in charges in the last year for calls to such nongovernment concerns as “Adult Fantasy Line,” “Call Me, I’m Michelle--Live” and “Gay Introductions.”

So, as of June 25, the General Services Department plans to block access to all pay-per-call numbers on the city’s lines.

“It’s been an ugly part of the operation,” conceded Don Keith, director of communications for General Services. “But we had to wait until the (state) Public Utilities Commission gave Pac Bell permission to block those lines.”

Most of the naughty calls were made during off hours, including some traced to one city councilman’s phone. The culprits turned out to be employees of a company that had installed carpet in the councilman’s office.

Keith pointed out that dial-a-porn has ballooned the city’s multimillion-dollar phone bill only slightly.

“I’m sure the city wastes more money in other areas,” he said.

Sales of a T-shirt that says, “Long Beach Police--We Do Windows,” have been halted, according to its designer.

Sue Gorba, an emergency room clerk at a hospital, said that she would donate the $800 in profit she has made to charity, inasmuch as the shirt has drawn criticism from dozens of residents as well as the city’s mayor and police chief.

The slogan refers to a January incident in which Long Beach Police Officer Mark Dickey allegedly pushed Don Jackson, a black civil rights activist, head-first into the window of a motorcycle shop. Dickey, who is white, faces a charge of assault in the case, which was secretely videotaped and drew national attention.

Gorba said the T-shirt represented “a kind of gallows humor around the emergency room. It was tongue-in-cheek stuff.”

Dickey and Officer Mark Ramsey, who are also charged with filing a false police report, had previously rejected use of the profits for their defense.

In the midst of a search for 4,000 species of birds, author Jim Clements stumbled upon a yellow-feathered, 8-foot-tall giant at the County Museum of Natural History. Clements, whose quest is intended to raise money for the museum’s Hall of Birds, dubbed the one-of-a-kind creature Megagallus humongous.

Mayor Tom Bradley’s aides vowed recently that he’ll soon unleash some major policy proposals to show that Hizzoner isn’t being hampered by the myriad investigations into his personal finances.

It was just a coincidence that a film crew was stationed on the mayor’s floor Monday, shooting a film called “Vital Signs.”