In the battle of the lumber companies,...

In the battle of the lumber companies, the weapons aren’t 2-by-4s. Two warring dealers are using their marquees to nail each other.

Hank (Spanky) Ceci of Tarzana Lumber Co. and Sherm Olmstead of Terry Lumber Co. in Reseda have been throwing barbs at each other for months. It started when Ceci’s clerk, in a fit of boredom one rainy day, spelled out: “Holy Flash Flood! Noah Received His Lumber from Us.” Not to be outdone, Olmstead’s marquee responded the next day: “The Truth Is Noah Returned His Lumber and Bought Ours.”

In another volley, when Olmstead advertised for a cashier, Ceci replied: “We always knew you needed help.” Olmstead countered: “I do, one to open the door and one to throw you out.” Hank retaliated with: “The only thing you can throw is bull.”

This week, Ceci has been using his marquee to tease Olmstead for closing early. “Only rude and crude wimps close at noon on Saturdays!” it reads. Olmstead’s marquee shoots back: “It’s OK! We do twice the business in half the time.”

No one is taking bets on who is going to have the last word. So far the lumber merchants aren’t bored.

Tuesday night was “America’s Night Out Against Crime,” an annual event in which communities across the country promoted crime prevention. Neighbors were asked to switch on their porch lights and spend the evening outside. In Culver City, residents participated in 15 block parties held in various neighborhoods.

Guess who delivered the hot dogs and balloons?

Armored cars from Brinks Home Security.

If you can’t stand the looks of your ugly old stove, don’t get it out of the kitchen. Matthew Fassberg, 31, of West Los Angeles restores and refinishes vintage ranges in his garage. He re-porcelains them in glitzy L.A. colors--bright oranges and yellows, black and white with neon trim, Southwestern dusty blue and green. You name it and your stove can have it. Prices for the ranges range up to $2,000 for the fanciest. Fassberg, an editor for television, said he started his business because he wanted “a hands-on type of non-desk job. “I looked around the house and thought, why not make those albatrosses more inviting to be around?”

If you do get your stove all gussied up, you might want to fix something special on it. You can get some good recipes from Ellen Rose. She recently opened a bookstore just for cooks on 3rd and Orlando avenues called the The Cook’s Library. It features every cookbook you can imagine. Rose serves tea to browsing customers and invites authors and chefs in for conversation. A former videotape editor, while on location she used to read and collect cookbooks like they were dime novels, she said. “I’d have one every evening like a cocktail.”