Scribes’ Hill: Henning’s Folly, or Idea Whose Time Has Come?

Let’s see now, you’ve taken your aunt and uncle from back East to the San Diego Zoo, Wild Animal Park, Sea World, Mission San Diego de Alcala, Balboa Park, Mission San Luis Rey, Hotel del Coronado, Horton Plaza, Cabrillo Monument, Old Town, Palomar Mountain, Presidio Park and Gaslamp Quarter.

And now they are getting antsy for something else to do.

Ah, but San Diego has a new tourist attraction.

You have heard of Scribes’ Hill?

This is not exactly Bunker Hill or San Juan Hill or Capitol Hill or even Benny Hill, but it is gaining a bit of notoriety hereabouts.

There are two ways to look at Scribes’ Hill, in terms of both its history and its demographics.

From the Chargers’ point of view, it can probably be paralleled with a leper colony.

However, those who populate Scribes’ Hill look upon it more as an inconvenient interlude in a day on the job.

Its genesis was Charger Coach Dan Henning’s determination that writers were an unnecessary distraction to the serious business at hand on the practice field. For that reason, he banned them from the premises. The writers, perhaps feeling embattled and under at least professional siege, sought higher ground.

Hence, the discovery of Scribes’ Hill, a nondescript mound of dirt that also happens to be home to a seemingly deserted “San Diego R/C Car Club” . . . whatever that might be or have been.

The writers were completing a two-week bivouac when I visited them one hot and dusty afternoon this week. I learned that you must take comfort with you. A hat would be recommended, as well as a canteen or cooler. Easy chairs or chaise lounges are also recommended.

I make these points because it became obvious to me that Henning had unwittingly created a new tourist attraction.

While visiting that ostracized group know collectively as Charger beat reporters, I encountered another travel writer on a similar mission, a man on a bicycle, another man who seemed to be a sort of “writers’ groupie,” and 14 motorcycle cops who will probably be part of the security detail when tourist traffic gets too heavy.

What’s more, two--count ‘em, two--television networks were there covering the writers as they covered the Chargers. Two Charger officials were also there, fearful lest the network cameras aim at the practice field during a particularly secretive time of preparation for Sunday’s game with Kansas City. Presumably, both Charger chaps were required to take antiseptic showers before returning to their offices.

This scenario, as it was unfolding, certainly piqued my interest. Here is an organization in desperate need of anything upbeat and positive it can get in terms of media exposure, and there was one medium interviewing another up on a knoll overlooking the practice field.

Later, I would ask Henning about the writers on the hill and he seemed mystified.

“I don’t have any idea what they’re doing up on the hill,” he said. “I didn’t create the hill.”

Alas, the man is the catalyst for a new tourist attraction, and he cares not to take credit.

I guess he had not really pondered the potential ramifications. Most coaches cannot see beyond a yard-marker when their sports are in season, especially National Football League coaches.

Henning’s only intent was to secure the practice field.

“I’m only interested in trying to create an atmosphere for concentration in the clubhouse and on the practice field,” he said.

He also expressed concern that writers might inadvertently tip secrets to the opposition, such as, perhaps, how he was employing certain players for a certain game or what message Jim McMahon had on his head band.

Henning seemed quite sincere, though his twinkling eyes and twisted grin kept you wondering if maybe he was not relishing the absurdity of the whole situation.

And it is a little bit absurd, maybe both on the hill and on the field. The Chargers, like most NFL teams, are paranoid to the point of being neurotic. And the writers, while steadfastly insisting upon the freedom to do their jobs, rarely encounter anything worth mentioning in a practice.

So what we have here is an amusing little impasse, for which the Chargers probably should be thankful. It has taken a little bit of the attention from their woeful start and focused it on a woeful piece of ground instead.

And, of course, it has given birth to Scribes’ Hill.

This could be big. It will start with maybe a catering truck or two and grow through post cards and foot traffic to hotels, restaurants, museums and shuttle buses. The financial impact could be terrific.

The centerpiece will be a statue of three or four writers with notebooks, folding chairs and binoculars. They would be gazing down the hill. There would be no players or coaches there, because the practice field would have been closed down to make room for the Scribes’ Hill monument.